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Dating a Sociopath 
I just wrote a long post and I don’t see it. What did I do wrong?
Hi nothing at all. I am so sorry this is the first chance I have had to get to my blog. I am just letting through comments now. I apologise for the delay.
I have already posted my nightmare on here a few weeks ago but I have some more questions because I still feel like the dumbest person in the world even though I’m very intelligent.
My first question is why do they not go away even though you’ve told them 1 million times and I even had to call the police and have them call him and tell him to stay away or he would be charged with harassment??
He in turn ignored the policeman’s warning and emailed me at work five days later… What he didn’t realize was that I was not at work that day and I worked for the federal government at the time in a facility that did not have its own police station in that area.. I shrieked in horror that night when I logged on to check my work email as I did any other time when I was not there and saw that he had emailed me twice and trying to recall one of the messages.. I was told that I had to involve the state police and I did that and I had the biggest idiot sent to my home for the first time ever.. I am 45 years old and I’ve never had to do this in my entire dating history with anybody nor have I ever met anybody like this person!! I had to go to the courthouse the next day to file for a temporary protection from abuse order against this idiot!! Which in turn meant that I had to miss another days work!! Long story short they only told me that I can only share the most recent incident in because there was no physical abuse the judge denied my request!!! I started crying and I appealed the judges decision and fought it because of how I wanted to do was make this crazy insane person go away!!!! He hired my ex-husband’s attorney that stole money from him and I while trying to process our divorce so he knew exactly what he was doing when he hired this attorney to defend himself against these charges!! I can’t go into the whole thing right now but will he ever go away he won’t sign anything he refused to sign the paper that my attorney told me he was going to make him sign and he managed to convince my attorney his attorney and the judge that he would leave me alone and he did not he did the exact opposite and stooped to such low levels to get to me two weeks later it still makes me shriek that he is that evil and manipulative!!! He used a mutual friend from high school on Facebook that had had a crush on him and she helped him track me on Facebook while I was in Vegas trying to relax by myself thinking he had gone away!!
do these people also used their children as an excuse?? He has an 18-year-old daughter from his one and only marriage he’s been divorced for 16 years and never remarried.. I met a woman who is a professional counselor and she told me that these types of people will use their children as an excuse to get out of holidays in making plans and doing any type of a committed relationship… He tells everybody that he meets online through match and in his profile how wonderful of a daughter she is and how great of a dad he is but he is not he is the exact opposite!!!
I know you’re not supposed to try to warn the next victim but he had been engaged to a girl named Lisa 2 1/2 years prior to me meeting him. All I knew was what he had told me about her and his family told me she was crazy and everything was her fault for them not working out.. Finally a few months ago I called her because she’s the member of a church group and that’s how I obtained her number and I only wish I had done this two and half years ago when this whole nightmare started!! It was like she was reading my life story with him we mirrored everybody’s beliefs and we talked for two hours about how evil he is in the things he had done that her which were so similar to what he had done to me.. I asked her how she finally got away from him and she told me that he had called her at work seven times in a row and she called his HR department and threatened to call the police if they didn’t make him stop.. He was laid off from that job a year later but he will tell you that it was a voluntary layoff I think he was let go because of her phone call.. He can’t hold a job for more than a few years because that’s where he gets most of his victims at work.. He maintains friendships with these women some of them are married and he would get mad at me when I was not okay with him still talking to these so-called friends!!! He is Facebook friends with about nine of them and it totally disgusted me and cause many of our fights he treated these skanky whores better than he did me and I was allegedly his girlfriend!! There is so much more to my story it expands almost 3 years and I’m still trying to recover my only concern is I’m moving back to the area next week from out-of-state where I’m at now and I don’t want him to come and hurt me or my dog!! I don’t have a good family and they always accuse me of being stupid and want to know why I kept going back to him and they blame me for this. I’ve been told by victims out reach that until he threatens me that he will kill me there’s nothing I can do and I don’t want him to show up out of the shadows and track me down and hurt me once he knows where I’m at when I get up there next week!! It sickens me that the laws are the way they are and people cannot be protected against these evil sociopaths Like him!! I have seen his history with women and he never let’s any of them go he will monitor them for years after they’ve been over with and I know he’ll never go away I don’t know what to do he is dangerous and I don’t want him to retaliate or try to hurt me.. I also believe he has multiple personalities and he is definitely a pathological liar!! He has told me that he had been abused by a family friend as a child and he said it was a man and that I’m the only person who’s ever gotten it out of him. He told me this a few months ago after I had moved down here trying to explain his behavior but part of me doesn’t believe him because he’s been going to different therapist for over 15 years and I don’t understand why none of them have ever been able to diagnose him to make him change and heal… Is it possible that he was sexually abused by a man and he either is gay or he thinks he’s gay and that is why he has made a career out of abusing and using women for sex only??? He has taken advantage of my love and kindness and caring and I feel totally violated by this person when all I ever trying to do was help him be a better person!! He has conducted a smear campaign against me and he even got my ex-husband on board and my ex-husband has done such evil things to me in the past six months he has left me financially ruined and I’m barely surviving!!! Luckily I have no children but I do have my wonderful dog and she means the world to me! I want to start going to a therapist when I move back to Pittsburgh next week but I need to find somebody who is capable of helping me and I know after reading the post on here that not many of them are trained in dealing with sociopaths this person!!
Please help I feel so lost and used an abandoned by this person I don’t know what to do with myself I want to date again but I am so guarded and hurt I’m afraid this is going to carryover and hot me for the rest of my life..
Kim
Hey Kim, first of you you are NOT dumb!! Although I absolutely appreciate you can leave with your brain so fried that you think you are dumb!!
1. They do not go away even after you asked. As they are predators and in their mind they decide when you no longer serve as source of supply. Secondly this is about ego and control. A sociopath hates to lose control – so in their mind they are the only ones who can end it.
2. He contacted you at work as they love to break you down. He would know that sending it to your work address would horrify you. So this is again about power and control (as of course – at work you have to abide by the rules) – also they control with fear so he would know that this would scare you.
3. Yes they love to hide behind anything (including children, illness anything that pulls on your heart strings) – as this is a great mask of deception and makes you look bad for objecting.
4. Yes they tell you that their exes are crazy (and will say that you are too)
5. I know how much it hurts and the sense of betrayal when you did all you could to help someone (they played victim) and they threw that back in your face.
I hope that you do go to a therapist. Who will help you through. We all understand the feeling of betrayal afterwads and the fog of confusion that you feel. But remember that nobody stays confused forever. The more that you learn – the more empowered you will feel and realise that it is not you – it is him and that you have had a lucky escape.
Please excuse the typos I’m talk texting on my iPhone and I didn’t realize there were so many in there thank you any help from anybody would be welcomed I just want this over with and begin to start living my life the way I wanted it before he came back into it!! He was a friend of mine from high school 20 years ago and that’s how he got to me we started out as friends when he found out I was getting divorced in the day we started dating his demeanor and attitude towards me completely changed…
My question is why do you think ive never heard from the sociopath I was with,we were engaged and he left a yr ago after all the help, money I spent trying to help him he left while I was away he stole things and totally discarded me
Hi Lisa,
I know how painful it is that you helped someone and that he simply discarded you. What I want you to know is that this is NOT your fault. You see without emotion – he sees relationships as a business transaction.
He therefore moved onto another business transaction. It wasn’t personal against you. The next victim is also a business transaction (what is in it for him)
This can be painful to come to terms with. But I expect during the time that you were with him you had lots of red flags…. warning signs to walk away? But your love for him was greater than your love for yourself.
Meeting someone like this should teach you the lesson to learn to trust yourself and your own judgement above someone else. Whilst unconditional love is admirable. It is a joy to be able to offer this. The sociopath never could. There is always a trade off (what they are getting) I Know afterwards you are left feeling stupid, hurt and confused – what was the truth…. and that you deserved better….
And this IS the truth. You DO deserve better!!! Now it is time to listen to YOU and to trust yourself. Love yourself. As you are worth it!! 🙂
You are correct and actually I never thought of my situation as a business transaction. I was in an 18 year relationship where she stole everything. She talked the bank into making a duplicate debt/ credit card and even carried a check book of my in her purse to forge checks to pay her minimum balances on her credit cards which were actually very high. After she wiped out my savings and retirement she poisoned me. This was the end of the relationship but before it was finally over she denied my access to medical help hoping that I would just drop dead as she planned. I have serious medical issues along with severer nerve damage. I will never be the same and I’m also terminally ill as a result and sick all of the time. I want to do what kim did and warn others. She works in Beverly Hills and the high end wealthy clients will become her next victim. She always talked about marring a rich old man and getting his money when they die. I know first hand that is capable of first degree murder and she has openly talked about killing people including myself. She did follow through of the second part when she plotted killing me two weeks before I was rushed to the ER of Cedar Sini hospital.
I only pray that others will not have the same fate as myself and somehow find a way to protect themselves from a sociopath.
Hi Jeff, Welcome to the site!! 🙂
thank you for this insight positive girl – “your love for them was greater than your love for yourself.”
exactly what I have searched the web all day to read.
Hi devastated welcome to the site. Another one is a life lesson to meet the compulsive liar as it forces you to trust yourself.
I have dedicated the past year to a sociopath, and the more I read the more I realize that it is not my fault. Thank you for this blog!!!
1. How do I deal with the absolute rage? I feel sometimes as if I’m foaming at the mouth and can physically feel my heart beat in my ears because I’m so angry for being taken advantage of, followed by feelings of stupidity/how did I let this happen?? These feelings happen to me mostly at night or when I’m alone.
2. Also, when do you know when you are ready to move on and start dating again(other new NON sociopathic people)? Does it get easier?
Ann anger is part of the 5 stages of grief and the healing process. Let it all out. (Read my post 5 stages of grief and the healing process). You say you are on your own when you feel this? This could be because you are repressing that anger the rest of the time. So… LET IT OUT go to town (Also read post how to get your feelings out without breaking no contact). I have ranted during those times, writing write how you feel. Get it all out of you. Listen to loud music. Just let it all out. His issues are not yours and they are not yours to carry. So let the anger out. Write emails (don’t put address) then save to draft. Keep a journal. Try not to repress it and let it out (even if you are ranting aloud to yourself) nobody can hear you. Just be at one with it and let it out it’s healthy and healing.
2. I would strongly advise to focus on you and healing and recovery before meeting someone new for two reasons. A) you risk meeting another and b) you owe it to yourself to do this .. don’t use someone else to heal you. Focus on you .. and when you don’t want one. You can bet one will come along. This also means you will set yourself higher standards and therefore whilst there are no guarantees should be ready for a happy healthy relationship that you deserve 🙂
I am not even sure I have the energy to type out everything yet…I feel like I have been telling my story so much. My relationship just ended on the 18th, the day before my birthday. I am starting to feel crazy because I am obsessed with reading and trying to understand…. So my first question is, will I ever understand? And also, how is it he could do everything he did, lie, cheat and leave me feeling so empty and yet I still wish he would just say he will change and come running back?
Hi Texas. I think on this site I have written about every question that you have asked. Because they were answers that I so desperately sought (and struggled to find). The answers are all inside of you. He could do all he did as he has no conscience and is selfish. But it wasn’t personal to hurt you. They don’t see it like that. It’s just business (they think with their head not their heart). Yes. If you read even posts here you should get answers the truth will set you free!!
@TexasSunshine
The truth is, you have a lot to work through, but yes, you will understand—in a way that is very personal to you, you will look at his behaviors in relationship to your own, you will obsess and study, and in doing so, hopefully, you will find yourself. You will eventually be able to confront reality and, at that point, whatever emptiness they are somehow able to fill for us on only a temporary basis, won’t feel the same anymore. That emptiness will be filled with a richer you.
Why is it, they say they love you, then diss appear, what are they doing when they give you the silent treatment?
Hello,
Please help. For the past 24 months I have dealt with who I believe to be a sociopath. We have had two break ups. I am a single mom. This man only works part time. He got a total of $6,000.00 from mom. He also abused me ; calling me horrible names, playing games with my mind even speaking negatively about my children. He belittled me. All that while telling me he loved me. I got so angry that I called him out on everything and he told me he was sick of me and to stay away. I feel so betrayed. I am in counseling for abuse. I tried to contact him before reading this and he did not reply. He always just pops back up after break ups when he is ready. He would always call me “crazy girl ” making me feel like I was losing it. My counselor said he is playing a game by not answering me. I am so sad and just cannot comprehend how I let all of this happen. Can you recommend any books to read on Sociopaths ?
Thank- you
Hi I have read thinks like without conscience by Robert hare. I haven’t read it but I have heard the sociopath next door is a good book. Psychopathyawareness is a good website. This site writes the facts to spell out the truth. When you know the truth you cannot deny it to yourself. Go to the top of this page read first the drop down menu boxes of is he/she a sociopath? And then read the drop down posts in healing and recovery. The first step is to establish no contact (you can see how to do it In the healing and recovery section).
Hi! I have what might be a unique situation… I have dated a sociopath in the past, and I can tell you with certainty that “No Contact” definitely works. How could it not. Honestly, half the battle was discovering the world of the Sociopath and how they function and operate to destroy you.
But here is the current problem: My father is dating a sociopath that has completely snared him. He is totally unaware and when told (by EVERYONE in his life) that she is no good, he refuses to believe any of it. She has gone so far as to set up a fake business in which he has now funneled over 1.5 million dollars to. My father was very successful and has now reached a point where he is very concerned about money but there is still plenty left for her to get. My relationship with my father is fine, but he is extremely stubborn and listens to no one.
He now pays her maintenance checks, a huge life insurance policy(which will be cashed out the second she can), a house, a car, diamonds, health care for life, etc etc…
My question is this…. What can I do??? How can “No Contact” be practiced for a family member that is completely unaware and unconvinced of what is happening? My father is getting a little older now, and starting to get very forgetful and a little spaced out. She is playing off of that perfectly and ultimately, her goal is complete power of attorney I’m afraid. Currently I am listed as the only one who can make decisions for him when it reaches that point. But she has enacted a smear campaign on me and it is so convincing that I can tell she is gaining ground on my unsuspecting and increasingly forgetful (very beginning of Alzheimer’s) father. Her master plan is to stop short of nothing but total ownership of everything.
I HAVE to do something. It affects not only the family’s monetary situation, but also his health. I flew into town one time to find him totally doped up in the bedroom while she was partying her ass off in the den with a friend of hers. Help please? This is a completely lost and painful situation to be in. I have since moved in with my father, but she has made it clear that she is not going ANYWHERE, and operates like a cyborg. Talking to her does absolutely no good. She only operates when he can see what she’s doing.
I’m totally at a loss with this…. Is there any advice for this when the Sociopath is affecting someone you love?
Hi sibony my first thoughts were to say that there is little you can do as your father has to make decisions for himself. Then you said he had Alzheimer’s. I don’t know what law is in your country but in UK, he could be seen as a vulnerable adult and social services would become involved for protection from abuse. If he is unable to make his own decisions and you think this is the case you could ask for someone to protect him from abuse. Can you speak to your father or do you not think he would listen to you?
Thank you for your response. I would say because it is beginning stages and his moments of forgetting are sporadic, he is not quite at the level of abuse protection. But that is good to know about that being my next step. I have spoken many times to my father about it as have many others. He just doesn’t know about all the things she’s doing like the fake business etc and she has done her job so well that he doesn’t believe anything anyone tells him.
She puts on an act like she works so hard at her business but she’s really off getting drunk in the day (alcoholic) when she says she has to leave and “work”. I could go on but picture ALL the classic stories that you have experienced and read about on here, and those EXACT things are happening. I wish “No Contact” would work for me in this situation but I love and care about my Dad’s(ad mine) too much to just exit from the situation…
At least he has you to look out for him. If she sees you as a threat she might try to isolate him from you. Keep an eye on his health. As I would imagine that there are similar protection from abuse (including financial abuse) laws in USA as UK.
Has anyone ever noted a SP in the early stages of the relationship, wearing their clothing or purfume as if they not only mirror your needs but they immerse themselves in you, as they have very little about themselves only the attention they get from others? Mine wore my prada & often bits of clothing.
I dated someone who fits all your criteria except he is very successful. Well what I think of as successful. An academic who moved up through the university ranks. So he doesn’t fit the “no life goals” portion. Anyway sometimes well most times I wonder if it was just me. When I first met him he was so sweet, caring, smart, sexy, and I did have sex with him very quickly, which was so out of the ordinary for me but I was recently divorced and had lost a 15 yr job I had at a fortune 500 company and had just been hired a a job making half the money. I just really wanted comfort and here was this good looking, smart, successful guy who had so much in common with me, but was successful in those things I only saw as hobbies.. I didn’t share my problems other than that I was recently divorced. But to shorten a long story everything was going fine until I found that he was not dependable, as far as keeping his word on meeting me. He was traveling in from a different city so at first I gave him the benefit of the doubt then I finally got feed up and KNEW I should move on and sent a very not nice message…. That I later regretted and knew that I had gone overboard because of my insecurities. After putting me through much hell. He finally forgave me. But it was never the same. He would treat me like a Queen, make me feel like I was the most important part of his life then turn it off like a faucet no contact no return calls or texts until he felt like being bothered, he would apologize explain how life was so busy or his mom was sick, then treat me like a Queen as precious as gold and then drop me like a hot rock and this would go on and on.. I couldn’t figure out what I was doing wrong, how could I do better, why was I making him mad and how could I stop it. But there was no rhyme to his venom… I even asked him, “do you like making me feel like shit” Is this entertainment to you.? I will say that he never told me he loved me. He never eluded to plans for the future. He would just give me a taste of happiness then slam the door in my face. Almost as if he wanted to see how much I would take. I feel like such a fool. I left a marriage that I was unhappy in telling myself that I could be miserable by myself then end up meeting this guy and allowed him to treat me like so much trash. I have read your post that say “they” are the sick ones, but don’t you have to be sick yourself to let someone treat you like this and still want more…. – the last text I sent him said ” You must think I am a glutton for punishment, well I’m done, I think I will find a store and go buy me some self respect”…. And if you can believe it… Every single day I want to text him and say I’m sorry to him. That is what I think is really sick…
Its so crazy reading through your comment thinking .. you could be me.. ive sent the EXACT same messages i am feeling the same with regards to “whats wrong with me” why do i want to speak with him.. its the there is one part of my brain that knows what hes done to me is so wrong and he doesnt love me.. but there is just a part of my brain .. or heart.. ? that misses him and worries about him and wants him back so desperately! its very weird .. i cant explain it or understand it. My friends / family keep yelling me when he does “forgive me” and come back saying why is he back in your life ?? and i can never answer the question. the longer it goes on the more open he is that is playing with me and getting enjoyment out of it. its a horrible place to be
Winnie, here is a hug from me to you. It amazes me how many of us can be going through the exact same thing and still feel so alone.
I will say the longer I hold on to no contact the easier it gets. I still think about him, worry abt him and even still want to call him at times but its eadier with every passing day and I hope its the same for you.
I did start counseling and I realize that I had open wounds that made me a perfect target and im working to heal those old wounds as well as the ones he created. I wish you Jiy and happiness and i ave to know and believe that as we rid ourselves of the poisonous people it opens space for us to find true love even if for a while it is learning to love ourselves… And Im so glad I found this site.. I dont feel so alone anymore.
I can believe wanting to text them and say sorry. I am going on 3 weeks no contact. I am hurting emotionally so greatly. For two years with two brief break ups I was with me ex. He wasn’t working when I met him. He now works as a school bus driver just 25 hours a week. He made me feel sorry for him from day 1, bad childhood, ex wife chested on him etc. I am a single mom. He told me he loved me, then would take that back then give it back. He owes me about 6000. He thinks nothing of breaking up, no contact then just popping up out of the wood work like nothing. It is all about sex, money and what I can do for him. I paid for a bankruptcy for him, 5 months of rent and he stated getting horribly verbally abusive. I couldn’t take it. Called him out on everything and he told me he was sick of me. I actually text him 3 weeks ago saying sorry!! He didn’t reply. I am so distraught, sad, betrayed and the worst thing is friends and family have backed away from me. I am so alone.
Might I also add my ex fits all the criteria of a Sociopath. He has told me he feels nothing for anyone. Also I should add that I sickly want contacf with him. What makes me sick is he is so nice to people on the outside…that made me sick. Towards the end of our last break up he was getting what I believe to be a narcissistic rage. He was outlandish…and he knows I always take him back. I don’t know what to do…
Hi Heather,
I think one of the things that complicates the relationship with the soc is that, as it changes, we have trouble adapting. I was with one for almost a year so, I understand what you’re talking about when you mention sensing some rage or, basically, a behavior change.
I believe it is true with these types that, the longer you stay, the worse it gets. Why? Because, simply by virtue of the fact you have stayed you have consented to their ill treatment—at each progressive level. Now, that’s important, because we know they “up” the game. Do they do it on purpose? I would guess it is more instinctual. Because they don’t have boundaries, what’s it matter to them if you will accept one blow or four? It doesn’t. What matters to them is what THEY want and are most comfortable with. Bottom line, the more you will accept, the more/worse you will experience. And, from here on out, you will always be defending/protecting yourself, because he already HAS you. Period.
He “told” you he “feels nothing for anyone”. Tie that comment to yourself. I know that is impossible to conceive, since he’s also prepared to tell you what you want to hear to get you to accept him upping the game. He knows you want contact. If you put a foot down, you may notice more rage because he has brought you this far and doesn’t think he can lose. Liken it to a car salesman who gets you to the point of signing a contract, then you pause, look up, and realize that he has just convinced you to buy a car that you don’t like for more than the one you preferred in the first place! When you put a stop to it, they lose their commission! Are you his commodity? Or, should the fool go sell to someone who will buy his cheap goods?
I would like to delete an earlier comment. I am afraid my ex might see it. How do I do that?
Can you tell me which comment and I can delete for you 😊
Yes – Oct. 23 – From Suckedinquickly at 7:17 a.m. – It is pretty long and tells my story. Thanks!
I can’t find it on my phone but will look to remove when I get back to my computer later today. Is it on this post?
You aren’t alone, you have your children! One thing I noticed these people prey on people who are extroverted. If you are broke, find things to do with your children which cost NO MONEY! Umm, people at the library knew us by first name, I didn’t have a computer and the library has free computer time for 2hrs and we picnic on sat and sun. Or we find some cheap crap to do. Exploring is what I called it, because their friends parents didn’t have to do it, they had cable in every room and all sorts of things. But my point is, you have children go to to the park, I can’t go the restroom alone!! You will meet people. Which is not what he is expecting you to do, he wants you to be at home “waiting on him”. Oh honey, the best revenge is living well!!!
Children are great you can sell it to them as exciting adventures.
That was for Heather, but they are a harder sell nowadays!! My 22,20 – when they were 10,12 – so much easier to please!! My current 12,10 – are a much tougher crowd, and want to argue and fight about everything!! I like the 3-8 audience, they like everything and still will take a nap!
Yes it is. I was having trouble posting it. But now I can see it.
Thank-you so much!! Truth is my kids are with their Dad this weekend. I know I’m not supposed to have contact..and I haven’t. I am feeling weak and am so dumb that I actually wrote a letter seeming like a lose puppy. My friends say he would use that to his advantage…help 🙂
Hi Heather, he would use this to his advantage too. https://datingasociopath.com/recovery-and-healing-after-dating-a-sociopath/establish-no-contact/how-to-get-your-feelings-out-without-breaking-no-contact/
Positive girl,
I hate to admit I broke no contacf last night. I sent him a letter and I sounded so pathetic in disbelief over what he did. Like a lost puppy dog. He did not respond. The sad thing is I feel bad about it, but now I gave him the power. Why oh why did I do that? 😦
Heather
I have done the same thing over and over again and break my no contact rule when I feel lonely!!
Mine never replies either because mine has obviously moved onto his next victim but I know your pain and how hurt you can be.. I hope you stay strong and try to move on with your life they are vultures and will dream every last drop of blood out of your life if you let them!!
They are at pretty good ages and get excited with things easily. But they are so intuitive. For example my soon to be 7 year old has seen my ups and downs. She has seen me sad over my ex. Last week she asked me. “Mom, will you like life again ?” It made me sad. As I am sure you saw I broke no contacf last night . Oh my gosh the letter I sent he could take full advantage of if he wanted. I feel kinda sick inside over it. It is 3:40 in the am and I am wide awake.
Sorry to confuse everyone I was kind of replying to everyone . Ha ha . I feel so stupid I did everything for this person. Since I basically told him how it was almost 4 weeks ago he turned it around on me and told me he was “sick” of me. I broke contacf last night. Sounding pathetic and sad. Like I said he ignored it. He blocked me on FB a month ago. This is person has gotten two years of my time, a bankruptcy paid for, 5 months rent, food, countless meals and activities out. He would tal this anger with life out on me, but be sweet when he needed to be. Expected an abnormal sexual relationship, I complied. On the outside he is charismatic to people. But I know the truth. I wish I could show you guys the note but don’t want to post it on here. So now he ignores this. In the past he thinks NOTHING of no contact then just contacting me out of the blue. Twice before he has done this. He is a joke too might I add. A 43 year old able bodied man who only works 25 hours a week . But I was told how weak I was. I am a single mom. I showed how sad and weak I was and I didn’t even show anger at him. I’m sorry. I feel really bad . Btw I start a new job Monday. I happen to be working for the same school district he works for . It is the second largest in the state. He will never know I am there . The sad thing is to him I am sex, money and someone who worshipped him. Isn’t that sick? I worshipped this guy like he was really something? Thanks for listening. I really have no one and I made a bad choice. Where do I go from here?
Why does the sociopath attach to my friends or friends of interest?
Remember that they are about controlling and winning. It probably sounds stupid that you have split so why would they do this now?
They love to go to town afterwards to hook up with your friends, tell stories about you, play victim.
Its akin to killing off the former victim. They can literally destroy your life, the sociopath would know that this would get to you. It is their way of saying – see how popular i am? see how powerful I am? I can even take your friends…. and they like me more than you.
I have written a lot of posts about it, look up ruining smear campaigns If you cant find it I will find them for you.
can a sociopath be a sex addict?
Deborah,
Yes absolutely. Sociopaths have a higher than normal level of testosterone. Sex is important to sociopaths (and often something that they are good at too).
thank u for getting back to me. im so lost right now, i start counseling on thursday. im still in love with this man. can u please tell me were i can find a sociopath support group meetings i read that they do have them. please. im still reading up on this sociopath thing cause its new to me.
I agree. My ex didn’t want to be around my friends bc he knew they had heard about him and didn’t like him. He would never meet anyone in two years. Now he seems happy go lucky..and I am the one who has no one. My only two friends talk to me only when they feel like it. They keep saying I will end up with him again. He and I don’t talk. My mom will not talk about it and avoids me at all costs. My father will talk about it but is distant. I feel he was all I had.
Heather, was he all that you had when you met him? When you met him did you have nobody but him in your life?
When at the end of the relationship you have less people in your world than you did at the beginning, realise that this person is BAD NEWS!!! …. You say you had friends at the beginning? This is what sociopaths do, they isolate you and remove you from people close to you. By isolating you they have absolute control over you.
Well actually I was very isolated bc just recently filing for divorce and a stay at home mom. But then I went to school and made friends and those friends are gone. The two friends I do have don’t have much to do with me now. He met me in a weak state and kept me there. He knows I hardly have anyone .
Ugh!! I am in the exit stage in the abandonment stage of almost 3 years of torture by mine!!
I recently moved back to the area where we are both from and I am so angry with him for what he has done to me and how he has discarded me like scum on the bottom of his shoe!!
I am so hurt and angry because he has obviously moved on to his next victim and he tried to play the friend card with me but it doesn’t ever work!
It is impossible to be friends with these people and the fact that I would even want to be his friend after what he did to me still shocks and amazes me!!
I have never in my life seen anybody who is so manipulative and convincing but at the same time incredibly selfish!
He is the grandmaster of all illusion and it disgusts me that he is walking the streets after what he did to me.
He is a brick wall there is nothing that could penetrate his brain or heart. His ability to detach from me after everything we went through is astonishing and the ability he has to move onto the next victim makes me sick!! I still do not believe this is my life after what I went through with him and who I was before I am a complete shell of my former self!!
I only live an hour and a half away from him and I intentionally moved farther so I wasn’t tempted to strangle him. Of course I am a nonviolent person but he had the ability to make me want to literarily wring his neck with my bare hands on a daily basis.. You couldn’t get anything into his brain no matter how hard I tried it didn’t even make it in one ear to go out the other things just bounce off of him!!
I am waiting for a local therapist to contact me to offer free counseling to deal with my abandonment and how I feel so empty and you used after this torture!!
I am so incredibly hurt and angry and I need to diver my anger towards something productive ..
Women need to be made aware of who these people are because I had no idea they even existed until he entered my life.
I tried to run after the first two weeks but he immediately started the head games and control and it continued and ruined me!!
Did yours keep coming back in the past? Mine came back twice before. I know in the two years I was just sex and money to him.
Yes they come back it’s just more of the same but worse. Not matter what their false empty promises are. Think about it you have less money. Less friends. Less self respect. Think of all the problems he has caused you. That is all sociopaths do ultimately they create problems they create them when there is no need for problems.
So very true. Do you expect yours to come back?
So day 2 of my work is done . I have to say I am at a new point. I am seeing him for who he is. I just wonder how he thinks it is ok that he did what he did, took so much money and we only live 6 miles from each other . Does he not think we may run into each other at some point? I feel I was having dealings with the devil. I feel he just dates around and when it doesn’t work out he comes back to me his resource who takes all abuse. I am so hurt over a person doing this to me and duping me like this . So I am hurt that he treated me like garbage and as a joke and took so much from my kids and I. Right now I don’t exist to him, but he thinks so little of me that when he wants sex or money he will be back thinking I will give it. I can’t do it anymore.
It can take a while to come out of the fog of confusion. And the mask of illusion that they fog your mind with.
Heather omg when I read parts of your story I had to reread it because I thought it was my story I’ve never in a million years thought I would be in this situation and the person would be living less than six miles away from me with another woman acting as if I don’t exist after all I did, all the money all the lawyers all the fines all the prodding in helping him become a responsible man he never wanted to grow up and be a responsible man he wanted me to take care of him and as long as I took care of him with a smile he woulda kept taking from me but that’s not what I want who the heck does he think he is a grown 48 year old man and live with a woman cant/won’t contribute nothing it was constantly always about him but maybe that was my stuff because I wanted him to be responsible and be able to stand on his own two feet and I thought that’s what he wanted to but no he decided to start using drugs again and left while I was on vacation Robbed me and now he’s around the corner like its nothing
Thing was lisa. It never was nothing. Only thing that changed was he stopped faking and he fabricated a new story both for himself and other people. Man of fantasy and whoever he wants to be.
Is this normal to feel this way?
I wish I knew what to expect from him, so I could be prepared
You just keep yourself away from him. Block all contact and don’t respond to him. He left. So keep it that way never ever leave the door even partially open. Please. Don’t worry what he is doing focus on you and your life.
Is sociopathic behavoir more common among latino men?
I don’t know the answer to this Lisa.
Positivagurl,
Hi.. I saw my Psychiatrist today. She told me that I have been emotionally, verbally, financially and sexually abused. She also says that she believes I suffer from PTSD due to it. She told me that loss of money was the least of what I was dealing with. She told me if he contacts me to ignore him or tell him. “Stay away.”
I told her my friends tell me to be strong and put it aside and to get thru it. She told me they are not Mental Health Professionals. Everyone walks all over me now. My one friend told me that my ex is probably smarter than my Psych, that he is a professional. My friend started to yell at me. I have realized that my weakness has made people treat me different. Today when I was at work all of a sudden my eyes filled with tears for no reason . I’m sorry to bother you…I have no one but you guys who understand what I am going thru. Boy he did a number on me.
Heather you are not bothering me. I am so happy to hear that you are receiving professional support. I wouldn’t want to say anything to you that would be in conflict with that treatment. I have been through ptsd. It was severe chronic. I met the psychos whilst still traumatised. When you have ptsd it does make you very vulnerable. It is something that you can make a recovery from. You sound like you need lots of love and supportive people around you. People you can trust. Who will not tell you that it is your fault. It isn’t your fault. What has happened to you isn’t your fault. I was also financially abused whilst traumatised. Your psychiatrist is right. I would let the money go. You would never see it rreturned and it would only keep contact to him. I wouldn’t tell him to stay away. No contact at all. This means blocking anyway that he can contact you. I use an app called blocker (I use android phone) if your friend is ‘yelling’ at you this is no friend. I am just pleased you are receiving professional support. Sending you a hug. You sound like you need it.
Thank you for the hug. No the money is a lost cause in fact he wanted more money. Yes, I’ll be honest, no body really wants to deal with me anymore bc of this situation. Everyone tells me I let it dominate me. Also my Dr. who has seen me thru all of this says I am doing better. I am very lonely. I spend a lot of time crying in the bathroom. Anyways,
Thanks
Heather I sent you an email. Can you let me know If you received it?
Just replied to it. 🙂
dang that was a big pill to swallow did I tell you that we were engaged beautiful ring which I still do have you mean to tell me that everything we shared day in and day out for 3 years wasnt nothin just an illusion why do they do that to people ? He knew i was really in love
Why do sociopaths attach to/ charm the friends you are interested in?
When you mention “source of supply” Can you give several options for this?
I feel I am not fitting any type.., ex: source of money, shelter, etc….
It can be anything Nicole. It could even be your company. He might like your company. Sociopaths get bored easily. If you are intelligent, mentally challenging that can be a good thing. Maybe you have social connections which are useful to him? Or are you an easy target to control to do what he wants?
Alternatively does he have an ex that he wants to make jealous?
I’ve been friends with a sociopath for nine years. I never understood why I allowed him in and out of my life. I thought we were best friends and you feel like you have this special bond with this person. The part I’m struggling with, is getting over that bond and emotional attachment. Also, How do you respond to the silent treatments and finding someone else? There’s so many questions. I know this is unhealthy, but why do I go back?
I was wondering if sociopaths work with their victims to find more victims.
What an interesting question Beverly. I wouldn’t imagine that they would, only because
1. They are secretive, so they keep whatever new source of supply they are moving onto secret
2. They isolate and seperate, anyone that they were interested in, the current victim would be kept right away from
3. The sociopath puts on a new mask with whoever is new in their life – so can become a different person, reflecting a mirror image back to the new person.
4. They might however use the new victim, to haunt and torment and keep away the old victim.
Is this what you meant?
Wow I’m always learning something new on this site is that why he allowed the woman to call my house constantly playing on my phone asking me do I want to hear them have sex simple stuff just outright crazy but what I don’t understand is I heard that he got married to this woman how did that happen he’s only known her a year at the most yet we known each other ever since we were 17 please get some insight into this crazy situation Ive been in
Marriage. Well that was probably in his interests to do so. And as for saying did you want to hear him and his new partner. that is sick but just goes to show how they really have little empathy for anyone else. Are you sure she was there? As they lie and play stupid mind games. Unless I hear proof I rarely believe what a socio says.
My father in law is currently dying in palliative care, and my mother in law’s sociopathic mask is slipping. At times for no obvious reason she simply refuses to let the children and grandchildren in to visit him and orders them out. Today there was a academy award winning display of tears with her sobbing that she has only been married to him sixteen years ( his second marriage) and she wasn’t getting to spend enough one on one time with him. She is forever stroking his arm, cuddling and kissing him.
Why is she denying family access at this time?
Do they genuinely feel any grief when a spouse dies?
What behaviour can I expect from her when it comes to organising the funeral and while attending the funeral?
I know she will depart from our lives once he is gone and move on to her next victim.
I am praying for you, expect the unexpected.
Hi Positiva, so glad I came across your site. Thank you…your articles and everyone’s comments are extremely helpful. I wonder if anyone has talked about the soc and emoticons? Once mine started using them on his cell it was as if he had finally discovered language. It wasn’t long before he had reverted to petroglyphs and cave man talk. He went crazy for all the little symbols and practically abandoned the English language altogether. The novelty wore off immediately for me but not for him. Soon the childishness was all I could see and began to realize how infantile he really was.
Hi welcome to the site. I hadn’t experienced with the emoticons. But I almost certainly did experience immaturity, like a teenager.
Hi, glad to be here. You’re doing so much good for all of us. Now I know it isn’t only me. The immaturity was terribly disappointing and because there wasn’t a real person to be with I felt really lonely in his company. I think its one of the saddest feelings.
Thanks for all the work you put in your site…I’m sorry that I typed so much I didn’t mean to I only wanted to say where Im at today but this all just came out…I guess the background—
I dated a woman for only 2 months and here it is almost 2 months later, and I’m still like stuck. Thanksgiving messed me up. I’m mainly just angry. She displayed almost all of the traits…telling me how great I am….wants a future, kids, marriage, etc…im 30 with no kids and she was only 22..I fell hard…maybe because of her over the top words of devotion, and yet I believed her. I don’t fool easily, but I believed her. I think she wanted to believe it 2…One day while at work I received a tex from her how I’m her world, so great, this and that. This was daily stuff I didn’t think much of it…I got home and she said how she was talking to her mom about how cute our kids would be, she wants to be pregnant, theres a chance she is…anyway I had my suspicions of her…shes a heroin and suboxone addict and while clean when we met I suspected a relapse, I had caught her tryin to cop a few weeks b4 and she really lied thru her teeth about it. Skillfully. So she had a new phone that day and I asked to see it, and looked at her texts. Instead of what I thought I would find, I found that 2 minutes after telling me her over the top devotion of her ‘love’ for me, she had texted her ex that she was thinking of him that day and that she missed him…they should meet up some night and talk…I was stunned I mean I get it on some levels, but not to say all the things she would tell me, kids and marriage and ‘forever’…to then text your ex?? It messed me up, because obviously that’s not love. Its not like I would prompt her or something to say all those things. I mean why even text me that stuff in the first place, right b4 u text your ex? Anyway she denied it for a hour, saying it was old texts, just showed up on her phone. I was stunned and wanted to believe her so bad ya know. I didn’t relent though and made her pack her shit and leave. Finally right before she left her whole demeanor changed…very cool and even sarcastic. She did not feel remorse, or embarrassment, or anything…I guess the mask came off
We worked together which made it rough. All I wanted was answers I mean why say those things, and then just leave like nothing?
We tried talking about things about 2 weeks later and she said how she just missed her x ‘platonically’ and how she wanted to be with me. To complicate things she did start shooting up again as soon as she left my house. Apparently just a few days and then stops but yea. Ok. (I know this is someone i cant be with )The weekend was all bs and despite her sayin she messed up and she loves me and sees herself being with me forever she disappeared the one night, didn’t text or call in the AM like she said she would, and just came into work like nothing…That I’m the one controlling, we’re not even dating, whats it matter if she didn’t text me….here I thought like she was remorseful and wanted to make it a priority to get back with me… I’m like why did we just talk all weekend and last night your telling me your commited ya know? We snapped at eachother… She said ‘Aw are you hurt.’ Anyway that was it for a few weeks. We don’t work together anymore, I don’t see her or am connected to her in any way…I initiated contact 3 weeks ago…just a few texts…trying to get closure…out of nowhere she texted me that she never wanted it to b like this, sometimes she hates herself, I do deserve ‘good’, and that she still loves me , just doesn’t think she can ever make up for what she did. She really confused me when she texted something like she knows we wont work but a part of her wants to make it work despite knowing the outcome…so she doesn’t feel right thinking about it cause its not fair…and that was it no explanation no nothing for like 24 hours…these are just texts we haven’t seen each other or talked in over a month..I tried calling her after that last one like wtf….finally like 24 hours later she said sorry she was sleeping..it pisses me off honestly thinking about it. I told her shes not good for me, and left it at that. 2 weeks ago she had texted me about a song she downloaded, made her think of me, whatever…it opened the door to more communication and I blew up on her texting…almost like im the crazy one..i just had to get all this stuff out…so here it is 2 weeks later, this is the longest we haven’t communicated. I expect to never hear from her again after I blew up on her…the thing is today I have an urge to text her…I want her to know that I know what shes about…I had realiszed she told me more lies, and I want her to know that I know…shes so cool and calm, and has made me the crazy one!…I want to tell her about herself..I typed a message and everything, just haven’t sent it.
@Larry, Hello! I don’t suggest sending the message. I have to co parent with my ex, I write two emails. The one when I am angry and I delete, (which is usually 2 pages long), lol. Then I go back and write the one I send, which is 2 sentences long. Everything you write is documentation they can use against you at a later date. Less is more. And if you have no reason to contact her, don’t. After my husband left I had several traumatic experiences. I went to therapy, I know cliche. If this is not your “thing”, keep a written journal and throw your letters in the fire place? There are several ways to go about healing your self, also “Dr Google” has books on how to deal with NS, a lot of these individuals have drug, alcohol, gambling, and sex addictions. And of course there is always us here on the website. At the bottom of this post there are several other posts which you might find of interest. Take care.
@Larry
I know this is unsatisfying for you, but she isn’t worth the effort. She won’t care and she will feel justified in playing with you further if you keep “coming around”. I’d recommend trying to stay out of her path at work as she is so cool, she’d probably be talented at instigating but not being impacted by dramas.
Thanks. .I didnt send it so its been 2 weeks..I don’t even want a response from her I just want her to know I know all the lies. ..I feel insulted..she thinks shes this big player I guess..
And yea ive read every article on here I think…woman can be textbook sociopath nd i dont like all the use of he…cuz she fits like everything..of course addiction can mimic it but probably just enhances the sociopathic mind.
Yes I know Larry. I think all of the earlier posts were written to MY sociopath who read this site. They were direct responses to his behaviour. Some I have gone back and edited, but they don’t read as well when the posts are made gender neutral, later posts were written gender neutral usually.
I do take your point. I think the biggest difference between male and female is society – and sex.
I am so grateful I came across your site. I have been in a relationship with a sociopath for 8 years, and leaving him/keeping him away was the hardest thing I’ve ever had to do. I’m blessed that I was able to get away before things got worse than they were.
My question is- now my sister is dating a sociopath… and a terrible one at that. She is very naive, and keeps falling into his traps time after time. He lies about just about everything to save face. When he gets caught in his lies, he deflects the blame to someone else (“you heard what I said wrong” etc.) They have a baby together, and he is manipulating her to the point that she doesn’t even want her family around anymore (I believe its because he knows we see through his “BS”). When I wrote a very strongly worded email to her expressing my concern for her, it became very clear that he had access to all her personal info (facebook, email, etc), and he has called threatening my life. She still took up for him, and blamed me for calling the cops because I was “trying to ruin their son’s life by taking his father away from him”. This all happened very recently. Myself and my family are to the point of turning our backs on her because she won’t listen to a word we say. He has complete control over her. He went so far as to say that if she brought the baby around our family, he would leave her or worse- take the baby and run.
My family and I have tried everything we can think of to get through to her. I don’t want to give up because she is my sister and I love her, but she has turned into his puppet. She defends everything he does, and he is never to blame for anything.
Please, if you could point me in the right direction of what I can do to help her see what is really going on, I would be eternally grateful. I fear I’ve lost her to his deception and manipulation.
Hi concerned, welcome to the site and am glad you have found us. You already know the answers with a sociopath having been with one for so long. He will feed her the message that you are bitter and jealous because you split with your husband. Or something like this. She might not have shown him the Facebook message as they are great at stalking and hacking. As you know yourself,anything you say or do might drive her closer towards him as he will paint you bad cop, he is good cop. Unfortunately it can take a long time for the heart to catch up with the head.
Maybe you need to say that you love her, will always be there for her but this situation is not good for you. Your life is being threatened (and good for you if you called cops).
All you can do in this situation is to remove yourself. In the hope that she will miss you. The out come could be that he will twist this reality and say see she never cared anyway. Then he plays her rescuer again you looking bad guy and him good.
But there is little else you can do. You have to protect yourself. Your own emotions and safety.
You know that sociopaths hate to lose control of their victims and would fight and ruin you to win. No holds barred. Don’t put yourself through this. Tell her she will always be there for her in the future should she need it. But you are not prepared to put your self at risk. You cannot rescue her, or save her. Only she can do this for herself.
You have been through enough. Take care of you and your own sanity or he will try to ruin you.
You don’t have to be in a relationship with this kind of person to get the full effects. I smelled a rat (& a lot of Control) & left before Anything even got started, but i guess “No thanks”. & disappearing wasn’t the correct answer-?
‘Experienced much of the same controlling behavior, but he/they are always very careful about it. Probably has had some practice @ it. & seems to have some lil’ Helpers 😦
Sociopaths have lack of feelings and emotions etc – my question is: can a real sociopath be ticklish? And yes it is a serious question!
I’m so glad I found this site. Our 17 year old daughter has fallen for an 18 year old guy who sent off red flags for us from the beginning (they have been dating for six months). I won’t go into that, but this site describes him so well and explains so much to me about his behaviour. We have warned our daughter repeatedly and at first she agreed with the problems we saw (we have always had a good relationship based on respect and trust), but she said that he was just so perfect 80 % of the time, and she just wanted to give it time, as he was working hard on changing some things. She couldn’t believe that such an amazing guy would choose her (and he constantly reminded her of that, that he could have any girl he wanted as girls were constantly coming on to him). Now she is completely behind him, literally and figuratively, and stood with him when he said we must stop interfering in their relationship and we’re the problem.
My question is, as parents who love our daughter and have warned her, what do we do now? Do we fight him for her, or do we let her go? Does she have to find out the hard way? Please tell me what we should do and what we shouldn’t do. Thank you so much. And thank you for this website.
Hi Michelle, there isn’t too much that you can do, if you have warned her. Apart from to be there. To realise that likely he will manipulate her. Be there for her, even if she does push you away. Remember that behind the scenes, he is probably pulling the strings, so try not to take it personally how she reacts. She will learn, if she has other options to leave to, and another home to come back to, this will help. try not to judge her – allow her to make her own mistakes as hard as this is. You will see from this site, that sociopaths can come across as the perfect partner… she has to see for herself the mask behind the illusion.
Thank you for responding and for the advice. It is very helpful.
Within the first two weeks of their relationship he was already talking about marriage (even as she was footing the bill for their outings/dinners with her hard-earned money), so I’m really hoping she’ll see him for what he is before that happens.
I hope so too Michelle. Fortunately If her family understand and are supportive when she wants to leave you will be there to pick her up. I hope that too much damage isn’t done to her 😦
Hi I was dating a sociopath, who then abandoned me after I had supported him so much, & I realise he rebounded to another girl within a month, after he left impulsively. About a year later he was back and I thought he was going to come back and fix the error, only he said, “he’d hurt me too much”.and duly went again, he cheated on the other woman.
I have a dilemma, should message the other woman to expose that and how I was actually there first and he rebounded, etc.? I really feel out of fairness I should expose him as a cheat and having messed me about. But would there be kickback from him?
Should I or not, I really don’t know. So far I have been silent which feels awful and like I am being controlled to silence and too considerate.
No. There is little point to do this. 1. She wouldn’t believe you. Also 2. He would use this to confirm just how crazy you are. How obsessed with him you are (which will elevate who he is in her mind). You might be telling the truth, but he is a pathological liar and will use whatever he can to confirm his lies to be true. You wouldn’t change her opnion of him. She needs to see this for herself. You would only be made out to be the bitter crazy ex. Confirming probably what he has already said about you 😦
I just wanted to make a comment. I tried before but it was deleted.
You don’t have to have dated or even physically touched a sociopath to get the full effects of their wrath.
I was charmed by one for over a year, & when I finally got the courage to ask his status, he informed me that he was ‘Sort Of” in a relationship for ‘2 or 3 months”. I guess it was So ‘special’ that he couldn’t quite remember??? This was such an obvious invitation to assist him in breaking it up, that I just had to leave. (As it turns out, I found out later, the lout had been living with her, moved into her apt. so I see no ‘Sort Of’s” here.’ I didn’t see him for a long time & never to speak to again, & got a bunch of crap stories like, “I made him break up with his G.F.” (how does one do that?) & “I broke his heart.”
Retaliation was in the form of all the things listed here. Following, tracking, spying, mobbing, cyber hacking, e mail theft (& I think distribution to his friends of those emails), verbally trashing me, to any dumb enough to listen to his whining. This has gone on for over 6 months @ this time!
We never had any physical contact, a date, or anything like it. In the only real lengthy conversation I had with him, he managed to shout @ me twice, trash his G.F. & relationship, & do a nice number on me too.
A few days after that conversation, I came to my senses in some ways, but might still have gone out with him if he had asked. No, he had a bunch of his friends follow me around yelling @ me instead. He couldn’t quite talk to me himself. He even brought his family into this!
So, @ this point I’ve gone from being interested in a grown man (or so i thought) & having to gain the approval of a small Village!!
I have a small family, & I’m very much an introvert. This crap was Not for me!!
It got UGLY after that!
You don’t have to have a relationship with one of these kinds of people.
If the jerk is still hacking my computer & reads this I DON’T REALLY CARE! – You did you best to destroy & bully me. It didn’t work.
While I had a physical & mental breakdown after having to put my Mother in a nursing home after 3 month of no sleep from having to watch her all night…You were hacking my computer. After I got a very serious diagnosis in hospital, you were suspecting me of sleeping with my daughter’s boyfriend. (or so inferred the last of the 3 porn email with a virus attached that you sent me) I didn’t open any of this crap with the very Personal headers, but I had the sender blocked.
No I don’t do things like that, but I guess you do?
And thanks for inquiring after my health, even though you knew from my emails that i was ill. Oh Wait! You didn’t give a crap about my health!
Sorry I didn’t offer to move you into my house after your attitude with G.F. made you homeless. That’s all you wanted, another excuse to blame me for something else. A cheap place that was a little more upwardly mobile?
Hi desi. Welcome to the site. Great comment!!
Hello, and thank you for the opportunity to share my story….It’s devastating to learn that I’ve spent the past seven years on the relationship with a sociopath. Unfortunately, I did go through all ‘circles of hell’ : I lost my house, my friends…my bank account was completely wiped, I lost several jobs….the list goes on and on…the most disappointing part, is my disappointing with myself, and inability to come to terms with a question ‘how could I let myself go so far, for so long?’, and why didn’t I see the signs that were there speaking for themselves clear and loud. The question that is repeatedly popping in my head over and over again – is what is wrong with me? ….what makes my situation complicated, is that during one of the latest ‘honeymoon’ periods last summer, I got pregnant and now expecting his child….I feel completely isolated, and helpless.
Thank you for listening,
Tanya.
Hi tatyana, welcome to the site. Am sure that your child will be a blessing to you in this life. My journey to he’ll started when I met the first and became pregnant with our daughter. I had no idea what would follow. Sadly my daughter died at the end of pregnancy. My thoughts? I didn’t care that he was gone but was devastated the loss of my daughter. (I couldn’t have anymore) so perhaps this will be a blessing a new beginning and a fresh start for you. It is not that you are stupid, it Is that you wanted to believe the myth and the lies. You wanted the good to be good. After so many losses you have the beauty of your child to look forward to to put down new foundations for you. I understand how tough it is to go through this in pregnancy I did too. Welcome to the site. Happy New year.