708 thoughts on “Ask me a question”

  1. Why do they change their phone numbers or block you once you’ve discovered the lies!?? I’m currently in therapy and after telling my story she said the guy i was seeing is a sociopath. Everytime his mouth moves he is lying! Dated him for 6 months. Told me he had been single for a year. Love bombed me, made it seem as if we were soul mates. Long story short i found out he is engaged and had been the whole time i was seeing him. He cheated on her!!! This is a liar, cheater, manipulator, criminal as well. He deceived me then after i confronted him poof! Said he lost his phone but i think he changed his number but why is what i struggle with!??? I know with his track record he can’t possibly change and be better for her because i caught him. He has 4 kids by 4 different women. 2 of them while he was in a previous marriage so he cheated on his ex wife!!! He’s got anger issues too. Beat a man with a baseball bat and hit a woman clerk in the face with a bottle of juice because she would not help him. He told me these stories and didnt seem to feel bad that he physically hurt these people.

  2. Hi,

    I am in the middle of going thru a divorced and my soon to be ex is def a sociopath. Reading others peoples story is very helpful…I feel like I am the one who wrote the stories since I had the same mishaps. I have taken control I do nt speak to him at all and when he tries to change things up since we have three kids I stay firm and answer back no or yes answers….I have been doing more reading in how to handle this with kids. Question tomorrow is his weekend with kids, he gets them every other weekend….so he decided to take a part time job on his weekends on Fridays from 5-12 i told him u figure it out with kids (this is nothing to do with kids I am being firm with him)….he doesnt want the kids at his place but wants to pick them up at 12 am which is not happening…I asked my 14 yr daughter to ask him where is mom bringing us tomorrow…he is not giving her any answer…what should I do I dont want to reach out to him and I dont like getting my 14 yr in middle.

    Thanks,

    Renee

  3. Why do you think that they see each and every woman they have a ‘relationship’ with as property?! My sociopath won’t let the mother of his children to. Not really and he never will yet he’s treating me exactly the same he did her but only tamer for me because there’s less violence towards me! I know this because the mother of his kids is now my friend! He’s been exposed but I’m too scared of the aftermath and the threats to really let go. I feel it’s better for my sanity and safety if I wait around for him to let me go. Considering the post about there being only 4 ways to really get rid and Beleive me I have tried countless times but I always cave because he’s made me feel lost without him and his threats come and it’s just a vicious circle! A little part of me hopes to god sooner rather than later he will get rid of me cause everything’s gotta be on his terms! I’m property I’m his!

    1. I felt this way too.now that it’s ended I have to keep reminding myself that I was praying every night ‘please make him end it and let us stay friends ‘.

      Well he did end it and we started staying friends but we must have a different definition. Anyway it seems now we have a ‘courteous’ text exchange but not often.

      So I got what I wanted – in that I am not blamed nor do I have that terrible second guessing thing that I do.

      But it still hurts and I still have questions unanswered.

      I’m healing

  4. Hi there:)
    You claim to be positive, but everything here shows a different story. I am actually really shocked that you have made this page, only to dish out endless negativity and I don’t understand why you have done so.
    I am looking for people who have advice on handling sociopaths, not people who have given up on it or who are demonising the condition.
    Are things here, as you claim, about “dating a sociopath” or are you the type of person who lies a little without admitting it to yourself?
    Is this about dating sociopaths or about NOT dating them, leaving them behind, abandoning them and hating on things you don’t understand? And if I MAY ask you this, are you now in a successful relationship and if not, why do you think yourself wise enough to guide other people in life?

      1. Hmm, well that is a weird way of “answering” people. Enough to drive any sociopath to complete distrust ofc.

    1. I can say that this site saved my life! Pretty positive for me.

      If I chose to continue to put up with my sp lies, I’d know how to thanks to this site.

      But mostly this site has shown me that I value myself too much to have someone lie to my face every day while saying they ‘love’ me.

      1. I’m sooooooo much better. Still struggling with nc but our last conversation (if you can call it that) ended eith him telling me he should have ended it 2 yrs ago. I asked why then did he continue to see me every day, tell me he loves me every day (several times a day), gifts, meeting me at airports to take me home, trips away….etc

        He didn’t answer

        And I got it!!! There is no answer. He doesn’t know why himself. He lied every day for 4.5 yrs about his name!!!! Amazing skill and scheming when you think of it.

        And I choose NOT to live with that any more. My choice!!!!! He left me yes! But now I am walking away.!!

        It will take time to heal but I have turned a corner

        This site helped sooooooo.much!! It’s been my rock and I thankyou positiva from the bottom of my heart!

      2. I think that if they do not know what they are, and don’t understand it. I don’t think that they know why they do what they do either – they just do. I think they know that they are different, but I think they see this in terms of superiority. Unless they have a diagnosis, or have figured it out, I don’t think they know. So good to hear that you have turned a corner!!

      3. Well… In my opinion, I’m no oracle of truth or anything.
        I do not think anyone should be stuck in bad situations, especially since they can turn dangerous.
        Life is supposed to be a gift, not a burden.
        Some people love their children, some are more neutral or even hateful and destructive towards them. This goes on, over and over, in generations, leaving subtle and clear differences in us all.
        This leads to totally different types of adults …and some, like sociopaths, can create serious problems.
        But I do not think that any personal opinions that these humans cannot be integrated in society, is a clear minded opinion.
        We cannot execute people for being unable to take other people’s emotions into account, many sociopaths will not do more harm than that. So in the end, these humans belong between us – and we need to share the things that does work, work on getting more ideas that does work and support everyone that takes damage from these things.
        Including the sociopath.

      4. I am unsure if it ever comes as a surprise to the sociopath – that you are not the first to post here. It’s no big deal to me on my site. I do get tired of arguing the same point. Believe me, if I was bitter against sociopaths, I would be like other writers and not have you comment on my site. But I don’t do that. Over the years, there have been good debate from both sides. This is my point of view. However, you are all so obvious, by the way that you write. By what you write, and also ‘moral outrage’ which of course, you probably – well you aren’t morally outraged at all.

    2. Anyone in a relationship with a sociopath is in a guildfrd cage . That always requires you to forgo all other relationships for that one . At first it feels like one us loved beyond measure but over time it is clear this is control . Eventually the flashes of the real character are exposed in moments of loss of control and suddenly you glimpse that possession is 9 tenths of the Love . A gilded cage is an appearance of golden couple to the world to the exclusion of all others even your wider family . Like taking a cuckoo into your nest you realise what seems the love of your life will stop at nothing to destroy your life until you totally depend on them . It’s toxic . It’s a mirage and trapped inside that Golden cage becomes violent verbally emotionally sexually even physically – I have read sociopaths are a product of a very neglected child hood and unwinding this behaviour embedded in their DNA is unheard of with no empathy gene. So hug your children hold them tight look them in the eye tell them you love them be there for them support their goals dreams and most of all put our technology down and be present in the moment to listen to them play games with them and share yourself . This way maybe the world will just have less sociopaths.

      1. We have been together for four years now and I know he would be extremely alone without me. Everyone tells me that I am nothing to him and that it’s time I should walk away because I might harm myself beyond a repairable degree. I love him too much to let him go through this alone. I don’t want to walk away from him. Is there no way of setting things right?

    3. I have been dating someone who claims to have been told about going through this condition by a few psychologists. He does have major behavioural issues and tends to be unable to understand human emotions even though I know somewhere down the line he loves me. Everyone tells me to leave him because they see me slipping into depression but my heart doesn’t want to abandon him. You’re right, there must be a way to set things right. If there are any, please share. for the past one and a half years, I have gone through a lot and all of a sudden he tells me to stay away from him because he doesn’t want to hurt me and that he knows he does and says that there is nothing they can do about it. Is there a way?

  5. I wasn’t offended. Just saying that this site has been great for me. The advice to run really made me see that staying was toxic… To me. Maybe not for another person… But definitely to me

  6. Am unsure what you are doing here? Visitors to this site have either been victimised and therefore write their story ask for what help they need. Or they are a sociopath. I dont have a problem with sociopaths commenting here. But be warned feign not to be … if you are would see you blocked. Simply because there is nothing worse than a hiding sociopath. And nothing weaker than one who hides for their own manipulative gain.

  7. Yes I am definitely stronger. Bit stuck today. I know his actions are alienating everyone in his life to the point that they are leaving.

    He’s alone. I feel sorry for him.i know I shouldn’t!! I’m struggling with my empathy and sympathy button today

    1. Jolene, I’m soooo glad to hear that you are growing into you current life in healing. I remember your first entry here. I too understand that place of empathy for your SP ex. It is what tie world needs. It’s also hard and unnatural to feel care and love for someone and have to stem that. It’s not how things are meant to be, to hinder your expressions of care for your own safety. But feeling that pain and yet staying strong and honoring your wellness is the best thing and a form of compassion in itself. Feeling sorry for him (or in my case her) and sending love without contact whenever possible is real. And moving forward and never going back to the damage you were under. I am so proud of you for using your heart and still staying strong. They are not mutually exclusive and that’s a big part of our empathic journey I believe. When I am having a hard time, when I’m feeling like reaching out or just feeling heartsick, I remind myself that my heart works fine, it cares, and it had learned to care for myself so well that it won’t walk into a lion’s den again. Anything I want to express can be expressed in health. Sending all my pride and love to you, Jolene. ❤

  8. Avivajaye thankyou.
    Weakest day I’ve had for a while and… I ran into him at the supermarket!! Ugh!!
    I smiled politely. He nodded. I text later and said nice to see you and… He ignores it. Of course.

    God when do the weak moments stop. Ok so the first ‘run in’ had to happen. I’ll change my routine a bit so I’m never there at same time. But I gues that first one was always going to be hard

      1. Yes but think of all you have learned it will be easier this time..i am on day 18 quitting smoking…. same principle!! 🙂 i liked smoking…. miss it…. but i know its not good for me and costs me a lot.

  9. If there is a fake farcebook page of you, then I am sure Farcebook can help you with it but I do not use such social media.

    You put yourself before all others.
    You ignore everything I say and I think you still have a lot of healing left before you should pretend to be so wise.

    This page is called “dating a sociopath”, this is the response you have me. You do not seem neither very mature or very healthy to me.

    I am sorry if I offended you, but you are acting like a crude, rude, negative human. And if you accuse me anymore of being a sociopath, I must remind you that:

    Sociopaths always accuse others of what they are guilty of themselves.

  10. Wow!! These are all my stories. Dated a sociopath for 6 months after a bad divorce. He was and is the stereotypical. I finally reached out to the girl he moved in with a week after he left me with no word. He had been dating her a year and begging her to marry him. He still is. She totally sees him for what he is now and is thankful I reached out to her. Problem is he has turned into the obsessive/jealous/crying/social media hacking sp. She is going to leave when finances allow. I feel for her but now she has knowledge. I guess my question is: what makes a sp obsessive with one relationship and blasé with another. He was blasé with me but never wanted me to break up with him. Not obsessive or jealous at all. But when he left he left. Without a word until I tracked him down. Still lied then about living with her.

    1. She probably wants commitment, and is looking for that in a partner. Or she might have something that he wants. She is probably easy to manipulate as well, and him telling her this, is exactly what she wants to hear. He probably sussed that this wouldn’t have the same effect with you.

    2. Good luck with that one, her trying to leave him. He hasn’t sourced another supply yet, it doesn’t sound like – so she wouldn’t find it too easy to do that. Unless she skipped town middle of night never to be heard from again.

  11. That’s the strange thing. I have my own nice home. A very successful career, etc. She has neither. Neither she nor I wanted to get married again. She’s not a pushover and neither am I. She is and always has been financially dependent on men, though. Am soo thankful but curious as to why he did not try to suck my finances dry when he is in so much debt. Instead, chose to be with her for no money. Maybe she needs him more. Idk. But I’m being sucked into their drama and cannot take it for my own health. I want to help her. I believe I did. But funny thing is…after over 20 years with a narcissist then 6 months with a sp. I’m thinking, Im not even good enough for a sp. Grateful but still trying to rebuild self esteem after 25 years of emotional abuse is hard. I know God did me a favor. I know the signs. Thank you for all you are doing.

  12. How do a sociapath act when he is exposed? It took me 2 years to figure out my ex boyfriend is a narcissist sociapath I started googling his behavior and he has every trait and Its scary. To make a long story short he tried one last hoover with me and I lost it. I told him that he is indeed a full blown sociapath that preys and used people and that he is a fraud, phony and a actor who dont know what real love is and I told him to go sit on a psychologist couch. I told him this via text and his response was you miserable bytch and than he went silent of course. How come he doesnt defend himself when I call him crazy. Will he disappear he suppose to have a new girlfriend and is so in love on facebook

    1. If exposed he would lie. Deflect attention elsewhere. Become angry. Say ‘what about you’ do false allegations against you to force you to back down and likely tell you that you are crazy.

  13. I LIVED WITH A VIOLENT, CRACK-ADDICTED PSYCHO WHO i HAVE DIVORCED. WAITING FOR IT TO BE FINAL. HE IS UNDER COURT SUPERVISION WHICH MADE IT MUCH EASIER. HE GETS OUT IN 12/16 AND I DO NOT FEEL SAFE WHERE I LIVE SINCE HE DID MUCH OF HIS ABUSE HERE. I CALLED THE POLICE AND FILED A REPORT LAST YEAR WHEN I REFUSED ENTRY AND HE KICKED IN MY DOOR. ONCE WHEN I TRIED TO LEAVE ONCE WE MOVED HERE (MY APT), HE STRANGLED ME..HE STARTED TALKING OUT TO HIMSELF THAT HE CAN’T DO THIS AND THEN HE STOPPED. IT MADE ME EXTREMELY SCARED FOR MY LIFE. I HAD ENOUGH ONCE HE WAS UNDER COURT SUPERVISION YET AGAIN FOR POSSESSION WHICH HE LIED TRYNA SAY THE COPS GOT THE WRONG PERSON. IT WAS A BLESSING IN DISGUISE WHEN HE WAS ARRESTED. WHEN I GAVE HIM HIS CLOTHES (CHAPERONE PRESENT), HE REMINDED ME HE GETS OUT IN DEC THIS YEAR. WHEN I ASKED FOR AND GOT THE DIVORCE HE REMINDED ME AGAIN THAT HE GETS OUT IN DEC 2016). I’VE NEVER OBTAINED A RESTRAINING ORDER AND AM CONTEMPLATING IT SINCE IT WOULD MAKE TRANSFERRING OUT OF THE PROJECT SOMEWHERE ELSE EASIER. I FEEL LIKE HE’S LIKELY TO RETURN AND MAKE GOOD ON HIS PAST THREATS AND IM JUST SITTING HERE ENJOYING MY LIFE WITHOUT HIM FINALLY. I JUST WANT TO BE ABLE TO START FRESH START SOMEWHERE ELSE HE DOESN’T NOW ABOUT. I’VE DONE RESEARCH ABOUT HIS LACK OF EMPATHY AND ALWAYS NEW SOMETHING WAS WRONG WITH HIM BECAUSE HE LACKED EMOTIONAL DEPTH AND HE SEEMED TO DRIFT OFF IN A WOLD OF HIS OWN. WHEN WE WERE TOGETHER IT SEEMED HE WAS NEVER QUITE “THERE”. A RESTRAINING ORDER AND WORKING WITH A DOMESTIC VIOLENCE AGENCY WILL HELP ME GET A TRANSFER OUT, HOWEVER, PSYCHO DON’T ABIDE BY THE RULES AND IT TAKES TIME FOR AN APT. TRANSFER TO GO THRU SOMETIMES. I’M ALSO THINKING SINCE HE IS A VINDICTIVE, MANIPULATIVE, SPITEFUL PERSON HE WILL BE EVEN MORE PISSED THAN HE WAS WHEN I FILED THE DIVORCE. HIS WORDS: SO YOU FINALLY MADE UP YOUR MIND?” I’M SO DONE. READING OTHER HORROR STORIES MAKE ME FEEL LESS ISOLATED. I NOW FROM NOW ON.. FORGET HOW CHARMING AND CHARISMATIC A PERSON IS..HEED THE WARNING SIGNS AND ED FLAGS..DANGER AHEAD..I DIDN’T PAY ATTENTION, WHEN i KNEW i SHOULD HAVE AND BOLTED. BAILED. KICKER FOR ME WAS IN ONE OF HIS VIOLENT RAGES..HE FLIPPED A BED ON MY LEG IN A HOTEL WHEN WE WERE DATING AND I WAS BLEEDING..NOT ONLY DID HE DOWNPLAY IT WHEN I LITERALLY BEGGED TO GET HELP.. HE TRIED TO SAY THAT I WOULD GET HIM IN TROUBLE IF WE WENT TO THE HOSPITAL. ITS NOT THAT BAD. I’M EXAGGERATING.. HE REFUSED TO LET ME LEAVE. HE LITERALLY TORE UP THE HOTEL I PAID FOR AND SHOCKED HIM SELF WHEN HE TORE THE RADIO OUT THE WALL. NOW THAT WAS FUNNY. THE ONLY BRIGHT SIDE IN THAT WHOLE SICK DRAMA. I SAID TO MYSELF THE FIRST OPPORTUNITY I GET LEAVE HIM.. HE MUST’VE KNOWN CAUSE THEN HE STUCK TO ME LIKE GLUE. HE GREW ON ME LIKE A BAD RASH AND I TURNED AROUND AND MARRIED THE CREEP. TURNED OUT HE WAS NEVER DIVORCED. I LOOK FORWARD TO THE DAY IT IS FINALIZED NEXT YEAR. IN THE MEANTIME I DO NOT DESIRE TO LIVE IN THE APT WE ONCE SHARED CAUSE I DON’T FEEL SAFE. I EVEN SAW HIM IN MY ARE TALKING TO SOMEONE FROM A DISTANCE HE USED DRUGS WITH IN THE PAST. AN OVERWHELMING SICKNESS AND FEAR CAME OVER ME. COURT ORDERED REHAB MY BEHIND. WHEN I THOUGHT NO HE COULDN’T BE TALKING WITH THAT PERSON HE SAY DUPED HIM IN ONE OF HIS TRANSACTIONS, HE TEXTED ME A FEW DAYS LATER WHICH VERIFIED IT WAS HIM, “WISHING ME ALL THE BEST. MISSING ME”. BS. I TOLD HIM NO CALLS NO TEXTS SINCE HE BEEN AWAY AND AFTER I GAVE HIS CLOTHES TO HIM IN 3/16 OF THIS YEAR. MIND YOU HE LEFT ON 3/11/16 ON HIS WAY TO THE STORE AND NEVER RETURNED WITHOUT ANY INDICATION HE WAS NOT RETURNING. NO REMORSE. EMPTY SORRIES. PLEASE FORGIVE ME. ONLY FOR THE PATTERN TO REPEAT SOON AFTER IF I WAS TO GIVE IN LIE IN THE PAST. I’M STERN NOW YET STILL FRIGHTENED OF WHAT HE HAS DONE IN THE PAST AND WHAT HE IS CAPABLE OF DOING IF HE KNOWS WHERE I LIVE. UR TRULY INSIGHTFUL AND UR THE ONLY SITE I’VE EVER WRITTEN ON. WHAT DO YOU RECOMMEND I DO. IM THINING SELF DEFENSE CLASSES THE LIE..I WANNA GET THE ORDER CUZ THAT WILL SIGNIFICANTLY HELP ME. I JUST FEAR HIS RETALIATION.

  14. WHAT ABOUT RESTRAINING ORDERS? MOVING AWAY SAFELY FROM PSYCHOPATHS? ON THE RECEIVING END OF ONE OF THEIR FULL OUT RAGES AND RANTS? THEIR USE OF 3RD PARTY TRIANGULATION AND WHEN UR BEING DISCARDED. THANKS FOR SPEAKING IN A NO NONSENSE FORUM. SCREW THE ONES (PSYCHO’S), WHO DON’T LIKE IT. THEY ALREADY BUSY TRYNA KEEP U EYES CLOSED TO THEIR NONSENSE. THEY CAN’T HANDLE THE TRUTH.

  15. There was a radio 4 programme about this issue this evening around 915pm . ( available on iplayer ) the police will enforce an order after a breech has occurred – the problem is that leaves the victim vulnerable . So my best advice is move and start afresh if you can and completely private settings on all social media . It’s sad but true the restrictions end up upon the victim with the unrepentant perpetrator who will not obey orders and a police force that cannot enforce until another crime is committed . You can only hope they tire of being re arrested recharged . My sympathies are with you God bless you

  16. I am a male victim abused emotionally, physically, mentally, and financially for 2 years.I new nothing about gaslighting,LOVEBOMBING, mirror imaging…anything.
    I married the most wonderful woman in the world…….lol..
    Untill I started noticing certain things.Mostly the words prove for me,did not match her actions of not caring about me all….
    All the stuff in your post,and online is unbelievable. To me..
    I as a man feel ashamed…and have been very hurt buy all this.And yes I do feel.stupid….Because my love for her was real,every bit of it…..my wonders and thoughts today are asking myself if her family is aware of this illness??????
    I just cant understand how family members would let them.get involved with relationships to begin with ,if they do know..
    I was close to the family members, I wrote a letter to her brother,I know she is running her smear campaign now.I think they would know her lies….because they know me…..she claims that I had abused her for over a year…….dont you think they would have known???? It’s all.crazy…….im.still a mess….
    I just started having dreams of intimacy with her,….i wake up crying and shacking……..and angry……..
    I.still.dont know what to do…

    1. Hi Thomas, thank you for your comment. I ‘hear’ the pain in what you write. I know that it can hurt, to think that you were close to her family and how could they let you be hurt like this, and it feels like a further loss and betrayal.

      You know how she had you fooled? You loved her? She also is great at playing the game with her family too. She would play the victim of you to her family. Being family members they are forced into taking a side. Of course this would be their family member. Remember that they are very manipulative, and tell the lie, sometimes believing the lie to be true. They are very convincing. I am sorry that this has hurt you. It just the game that they play. Anybody that they can isolate you from, makes them feel more powerful and in control.

      They are pathological liars. You will probably have found this out by now. The best advice is to avoid mutual people for a while, and concentrate on healing. Go no contact with her, including her friends and family. Stick to people who are there for you, this will help you with healing. I know that initial pain, is heartache. Betrayal. Confusion even? The longer that you do no contact, the easier it becomes. Also focus on gratitude, instead of focusing on your losses, focus on what you have in your life, no matter how humble those things might be. This could be from a warm bed to sleep in, and food in the shops. When you do this, joy, light, and more happiness floods into your life. It takes discipline at first, but it does help with healing. As you are focusing on gratitude you are focusing your mind, and wont have room in your mind for her. As she isn’t something for you to be grateful for. If you are really struggling, with sleep and anxiety, maybe speak to a doctor, or consider seeking therapy. Know that this is NOT your fault. If she was a sociopath (I don’t know that she is), there would be nothing you could do to change the outcome, the outcome is always the same. You don’t need someone who treats you this way. You deserve so much more.

  17. One of the things that really gets to me though………sociopaths are all like, “We’re incapable of feelings and emotions. YOU are the dumb ones who allowed yourself to be played. We are misunderstood. Blah Blah Blah……..you knew what you were getting into and you stayed in it……that’s on you, not me.”

    But where is the accountability? Accountability is a part of life, no matter who you are or what you are like. If you break laws, you get in trouble. If you don’t pay your bills, they shut off your phone and utilities and evict you. If you have children with people, you have a responsibility to those children because they need to fed and clothed and have a place to live. If you decimate another person financially and walk away, that person is unable to pay their bills and maybe will even lose their place to live because of someone else’s actions.

    If you hurt someone YOU ARE RESPONSIBLE. YOU DO HAVE ACCOUNTABILITY. If you hit someone with your car and drive off, you will get in trouble.

    I don’t see any sociopath saying “I’m a sociopath, therefore I have no accountability for my actions.” They just say “You don’t understand what we are, so since you don’t understand it, you shouldn’t be bashing sociopaths.” Yuck. That thought logic makes no sense.

    YOU STILL NEED TO BE ACCOUNTABLE FOR YOUR WORDS AND ACTIONS.

  18. I work with my ex who is a sociopath in the same office and it is very hurtful to have caught him cheating on me at the same workplace. I always left the door open but now this time i accused him,abused him an d told him to leave.However he came back to me and with no guilt he said some real hurtful things to me and has blocked me. I am happy as the girl he cheated on me with is still seeing him and as per him they are just friends.Reading this page has answered all my questions.But hurtful it is and i hope someday i will be able to forget but not the lessons learned.please help as in how can we simply not get affected by such a situation like same workplace and sudden encounters at work with a sociopath?

  19. First, I am a diagnosed SP. I’ve known since I was a child that my kind of love was different then the non-SP’s of the world. Most wouldn’t call what I feel as love, but most people don’t get that my frontal lobe is little more than a thin line of blue on a scan. I’ll take what blips I can get.

    Second, I am married and not an abusive lier to my wife. I FORCE myself to be honest, but my kindness is genuine. I protect her, even from myself. There are pleanty of people in the world for my monster to bite. But never her.

    Some of us work hard to subdue that with which can ruin us. Even among us SPs. She is my world.

    1. If you don’t mind sharing – how did you come to get a diagnosis as a child ? Do either if your parents have an SP diagnosis ? Also is the diagnosis linked at all to aspergers or autism ? You sound very self aware .

  20. Hi. I’ll be brief. I used to have fixing compulsions due to BPD parent. I fell for a NPD probably a little ASPD also. She discarded me with horrendous cruelty, 2 month pregnant. I couldn’t believe it, studied psychiatry to exorcize this. I’ve healed enormously and found true love (in myself), I love her for that (kind of sick…I know), but love is the only answer. My doughter is one year old. Never seen her. She gives me two options. To solve it amicably by accepting paternity without court involvement, or to forget everything for ever. What should I do :
    1- Go to court and live the passion of Christ for the rest of my life.
    2- Forget it. Love from a distance. Love myself. Surrender my child to God’s will.

  21. Hi i wonder why mine Sociopath never hovered or ever contacted me after he discarded me? Not that i want that, but i read they always try to hoover you back? Please response thank you in advance

    1. Hi sara how long ago did he leave? You can get random contact a year or more later. Some people say 3 years later they get random contact. What did he do when he left? Did he ruin you?

      1. Hi he left in 2013 now four years ago. He wanted to marry me very fast pushing me, I refused because it was way too fast . He then just one day picked a fight that I wore too revealing and made me cry , which in turn got me angry and he did too then he said were not compatible and he just broke up I contacted him again once for closure but he didn’t give any just more restrictions so I never contacted again neither did he . We dated 9 months .

  22. To get a idea, first date he bought flowers expensive perfume, wined dined me . Bought gifts all the time every week for me and my family. Drove hours to get to me several times week. He did have a good job because we worked for the same company although not same location. He has a house car everything, we never had sex cause he “respected” me . So I never understood what he saw a supply in me? He did mentions marry every week and pushed for it. When I declined he got very aggressive and mad. And then said he felt the interest in our relationship is gone since I don’t want to Marry. He accused me of looking Too much in mirrors and revealing clothes.he actually once after a break up decided to go to counseling to save our relationship. He went and took me along, all this without having sex or ever asking me for money. So What kind of supply was ?

    1. Do you think he was a narcissist and not a sociopath? They are usually pathological liars. Charming telling you what they think they want you to hear. You say you did not have sex? So you weren’t in a relationship? Sociopaths push for intimacy almost immediately.

      1. I’m pretty sure he was a sociopath. He ticked al the boxes, he love bombed me then seduced me and then pushed for marriage also he started to compare me with others , belittle me and was very aggressive . We didn’t have sex because of religion . He mirrored me , I wanted to stay virgin until marriage so he respected that sort of. But we did do other stuff besides penetration. He started out with a sob story on first date about bad childhood . Eventually when he was putting restrictions on me and I didn’t went along , it all ended very fast. Even during our relationship he went to counseling for anger issues . Do I’m sure he wasn’t a narcissistic . He was a nypd cop as well.

  23. He also Declarer intense love for me and in one day it was all over. After spending intensive time with ,e for nine months calling me ten times a day spending thousand of dollars on me it just ended just like that and I never ever heard again from him.? We even met each other family etc. just out of the blue because I dress too revealing I wasn’t compatible anymore? He also picked fight over little things all the time. Why I am convinced he is a sociopath is he took me to a jewelry store to look for engagement ring on two months dating? And then ended it with never looking back ?

  24. Plus last thing he HATED His mom and that was his sob story from day 1 . He never got the love from his mom and wants a happily ever after from someone who understands him , oh the trap!

  25. How come i post this question on several blogs but no one one wants to answer it? Positiva girl i see you answering oter commentators too. please could you help me out? why a Socio doesn’t hoover you back or never return?

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