Some work, some choose you as their career option!
Whilst a character trait of all sociopaths is parsidical lifestyle. Some do go to work, and hold down jobs, often very powerful jobs.
Low functioning sociopath
The low functioning sociopath, is what i often discuss on this site. They are the ones who are the provincial con man, they operate one to one. Often using love to fraud someone in a relationship. They are natural predators. When meeting someone –
- They immediately assess you. How likely are you to fall for the con? They ask you questions to try to test you. To see what your reaction will be.
- Trial information back to you, to see how you respond
If you are seen as a good victim, the sociopath will then move on to using information gained in the assessment stage to seduce you, to lure you in, to build trust. Which is false, as it is based upon lies.
You will not be aware of the lies that are told in the beginning.
Lack of conscience
The sociopath has a lack of conscience. No remorse, guilt or shame for their actions. Because of this, they can easily lie to you. Can stare right into your face and lie. if you look closely there are the signs that this person is lying, but you quickly put these thoughts to the back of your mind.
Deceptive mask
The sociopath will, when he first meets you, be unsure who to be. He will not know what mask to wear until he knows what he needs to be, to capture you. To do this he needs information about you. He will work hard to find out as much information about you, as quickly as he can.
Capturing is a good word. As this is what he does. Luring you into his web of deceit. Where so many lies are told, that he begins to partially believe his own lies. Not knowing the difference between truth and fiction.
In the sociopaths mind they go into character. Of who they need to be. The last person that i was with, had lived in 3 different geographical locations. Each place had a different accent. I found looking back, that when spinning lies, he was moving himself into character. This is why his accent changed. In his mind he was in character. Because psychologically he was in character, his vocal accent changed. This was to make his persona more believable. When his accent changed, was when he put on a new mask, and was almost believing himself the lies that he told. His persona, and his body language changed, as did his accent.
The low functioning sociopath has little regard for morals, right or wrong, keeping to the law. They always feel that they are above the law. They get pleasure from conning, and duping people. They enjoy putting on a new mask and being a different person. It is by telling lies, and actions that are deliberately set up, to manipulate and deceive, that the victim will believe that they are with someone who is wonderful, kind, caring, and someone who they can build a future with. The sociopath just sees you as somebody who they can use, for whatever it is that they want (whilst at the same time, lying through their teeth to tell you that you are the love of their life).
They have a lack of ability to make future plans. Living very much in the moment. They do not think of potential future outcome of behaviour, and that of course they will eventually get caught. They enjoy using somebody for as long as they can. Low functioning sociopaths can cause a lot of damage to a persons life. You are literally prey, prey that they will use, and live off.
Damage that can done by the sociopath mask of deception
- Lack of self esteem/psychological damage
- Financial damage
- Damage to your own networks, family, friends
- Damage to your employment
- Threat of losing your home
In fact, damage to any area of your life, where you have a life, and the sociopath has none. A sociopath will mirror you, and live off of your life force. As the sociopath plays the victim so very well, you are lured into feeling sorry for him. This mask of vulnerability is just an act. A sociopath can turn on the tears, and go into full dramatic mode. Simply to con and deceive. Will be sobbing, and wiping his face as if there were tears. But there will be none.
See this video of Mick Philpott – sociopath who called his press conference after his 6 children died in a house fire, that he was responsible for setting, to get back his ex who had left (he was living with two women at the same time), he wanted to frame her, and get her children back. It backfired and sadly all of the children died in the fire. This is him, fake acting, fake tears. Its all an act to deceive.
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=jxq6Zvr8mPY
Not caring that he has caused all his childrens death. He brazenly fakes tears, when there are no tears. Will use a tissue and sniff. Sociopaths will great lengths to deceive. They will do this to your face.
Parasitic lifestyle
The sociopath thinks that he or she is above having to work for a living and pay for themselves. A sociopath can be attracted to someone who is a single parent, who has a home and income from the state, someone who has a lot of money and is bragging about what they want. If they do not have what they want, they find some way to take it. The sociopath does not think about your needs, your rights or your welfare, or that taking from you, will lead you to go without. The sociopath enjoys conning, scamming and stealing. Because the sociopath has no guilt, feels no sense of remorse or shame, they can do this blatantly to your face, whilst telling you that they ‘love you’. If you are ever in doubt, when you hear the sociopath say the words ‘I love you’, change the words to ‘I am using you’.
The high functioning sociopath
The high functioning sociopath, is intelligent, and does work. However whilst the low functioning sociopath can cause damage one to one, the high functioning sociopath can cause damage to millions.
A good example of a high functioning sociopath, is a world leader, someone who works in politics (I am not saying that all politicians are psychopaths or sociopaths, but certainly some are). You will witness the high functioning politician do the following:
- Lying (about policies and political spin)
- Deflection of blame
- Need to go to war, when there is no real need for it (war on terror)
- Feeding false information to cause fear and control
- Showing a total lack of empathy, in the guise of (for the greater good)
- High personal expenses at the expense of the tax payer
- Shifting the blame (its always someone else’s fault, last Government or some other factor)
- Never answering a question in a direct way
- Using others to achieve their own personal goals
Have you ever watched a politician be asked a direct question, and yet answer the question without really answering the question at all?
The low functioning sociopath does exactly the same. Other examples, are
Jimmy Savile, High functioning Charismatic Sociopath – who hid behind his celebrity status to abuse young girls. This is a great video with Louis Theroux
http://www.dailymotion.com/video/xu2udi_when-louis-theroux-met-jimmy-saville_news#.UWdq7qLqmzg
Other cases:
- Bernard Maddoff a high functioning charismatic sociopath who ripped off rich and famous in USA conning people out of 50 billion dollars. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=cxFBurk12Gs
Another high functioning sociopath
- Harold Shipman – this time a distempered psychopath who worked as a doctor, he killed lots of people through his work. https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=mYWK-usE-OY
All sociopaths are deceptive, dishonest and compulsive pathological liars. They put on a mask of deception to achieve their own agenda. Having little feeling, they get a rush of endorphines, by conning, duping, and deceiving.
The last case is extreme, it is rare for somebody to kill, most don’t kill, but they can suck the life out of your life, and cause complete destruction, resulting in a life that looks like it has been in a car crash.
Copyright datingasociopath.com 2013
Dating a Sociopath 
What do you do when the person you feel is the sociopath is your (adult ) child,who you cannot cut out of your life?
You love, with boundaries. I write about dating a sociopath. I do understand what you are talking about too.
My answer is from a spiritual perspective. I believe that we choose our life lessons before we are born. We choose our parents. And it is already agreed who our children will be, and the lessons that they have to teach us.
It is tough when it is your child. As you love your child, but they can cause so much destruction to your own life. All you can do, is remember –
YOU are the parent.
Set the boundaries what is and is not acceptable
If you have to distance for a while, then sometimes you have to do so. But let them know – that you are distancing from the behaviour. Not from them. That you love them, but you do not love the behaviour. That it is not acceptable to you. (remember this is in their brain, its the way that their brain works)…..
As long as you are honest. Distance is fine. As long as you are making it clear that you are distancing yourself from the behaviour not the person. The love of your child is still there.
Can you write a letter explaining this. With emphasis that you love your child – but you cannot cope with the hurtful behaviour anymore? or have things broken down too much?
The point is, no matter what you love your child
I. Have lean that we teach our kids but our kids really teach us so we have to lean to pray and let them make their own choices at the same time don’t embrace them when their choices are bad like my daughter wanted to live a gay life i prayed to My God to deliver and he did parent we have power over that demon with Gods help Love them always don’t worry just pray if God can’t do it it can’t be done Ps dont get mad that My God have power over all demon (PRAY)
I love your site & its my therapy, my inspiration, I read posts, info on it every day & makes me feel stronger & not want to contact my ex, so thats good. Even got urge to write my own blog of being with a sociopath. Even got the title in mind, Boulevard of Broken Dreams, Pieces of You, Castles in the Sky. Lol. He was loud & talking at me, lecturing me every day since we got back together for the 3rd time, just before xmas, too much of a head ….. Now i’m out of it, i will never go back. His charming facade was vanishing, appearing less & less, the nasty side Mr Hyde was present more & more. I was in love with who i thought he was, the facade, him mirroring back my dreams of a heartfelt romance. But he was the wolf in sheeps clothing. He was more narcisst I think but with bpd, sociopath, but minus the stealing money or possessions, he worked when he had too. but he kept lecturing me how hard he worked years ago, 14 hrs a day hard physical trade work & said he socialised at church, went to bible studies, did music, more than i ever will in my life, he was so competitive & i’m not. When he was love bombing he said i was the most forgiving woman, pretty, marriage, trip away. but so shallow emotions as he was getting distant alot the last few wks of rship & pretended he’d called me on mobile & landline, to say he was staying home that nite, but there were no msgs or missed call msgs or anything. I think he wanted to create drama, he knew i’d get upset & get suspicious, it was a way of him exiting the rship, as we argued alot on the phone, he’d hang up, then he called the police on me because i felt suicidal. He knew that my friends would step in, protect me & tell me not to see him anymore. so it was mind games for sure, as he wasnt honest to tell me its over. He left some stuff in my house & his spare house key in the bag on my front porch, i think, incase he wanted to return? incase his new option didnt work out? 2 wks later he wrote distant cold note wanting his stuff back. The tone of his note was like we never knew each other at all, a complete stranger. Weird. Then a few wks later again he tossed things i’d left at his place, over my back fence in a bag incl photos of me! & letters i’d written about the break up, trying to understand, ask why he behaved like this. It was a weird rollercoaster of a rship, him creating drama, i can see the cycle, pattern now that i’m out of it. Writing this is therapy & reading your experiences, is too. Sorry for the long msg. Thankyou again for this forum, site. We’re not alone at least. All dated the same man or women, well almost anyway.
Yes writing is good therapy – it does sound like we dated the same guy I think sometimes. Different stories but the patterns are all the same.
Its all about power and control for these sociopaths! Mine was 18 years of marriage with 2 daughters.My Ex got away with all my money(millions) because he is a president Infidelity invest.,he made up bold face lies throughout our million dollar trial.He always told me he had the power in the court,and I didn’t stand a chance.He was an everyday “tornado’ in our lives so Im lucky to be alive so far.Though he has promised,I don’t know what more he can do to destroy me and the children. Although he has power and a lot of money to buy more evil, and still never be caught. (He gets people to do all his dirty work) Oh yes he can also fool anyone with his charming side as he sings all kinds of Beatles love songs to impress.He is a true snake in a suit.
He cheated his way all the way to the top,getting all the promotions,getting innocent people fired. AbbyJ has no idea what a sadist and vindictive man she’s got working until he wants her seat. It disgusts me that there is so much corruption in our courts and all these “Mr Ripleys” get away with murder and hurting children.He has about 35 million dollars(with my marital money) while Im in debt from the divorce.He hated being a family man and used his children to appear innocent in court, totally lying about his abuse towards me and the kids. Read, Money talks…
Oh wow, welcome to the site sjiv, I am so sorry for your losses. It must feel that you are in the midst of a tornado. It sounds like you are going through such a rough time, I am glad you found us!! 🙂
Not all sociopaths are “deceptive” and “dishonest”. Psychopathic behaviour is different than psychopathy itself, which is a very misunderstood type of personality.
Being deceptive and dishonest is a hallmark trait of being a sociopath. What makes you think otherwise? Just wearing a mask and mirroring someone is deceptive and dishonest.
I see a pattern with all of the sociopaths that visit your site (I’m making an assumption they are based on their comments). They get mad at the thought of being called a liar…and swear up and down they are honest. Or at he very least, they argue for hours about how “not ALL sociopaths are liars.” Puh-lease. It really just proves the point even more.
Omg, Mr. Annoyed, you yourself look like a sociopath with that manipulative presumption! Of course that when someone was born a sociopath and they do not hurt other people, they are offended when someone calls them liars. I know several sociopaths who do not lie. They have the urge to do it, but they choose not to lie because they know it’s wrong. If you’re a good parent and your child is born sociopathic, you can teach them basic morals! I hate this demonization of people with mental disorders. Judge acts, not they way people were born.
If we tell the truth some times, it’s because we choose to, because it’s convenient.
I think I may have met a high functioning sociopath and I admire I feel scared. His profession is acting/ directing so he would be very good at acting and deceiving. He is exceptionally charming but also very deviant in many ways which in a strange way is exciting. He is also diagnosed with Asperger’s syndrome or so he says which is his excuse for not feeling empathy, he disappears for days on end with no contact whatsoever, does not respond to messages or phone calls etc. yet when I am with him he makes me feel amazing, it is such a roller coaster, I feel as though I should walk away but I don’t know how!!!
People who have aspergers are very intelligent and they can struggle with empathy and can seem quite blunt sometimes. They can also get lost In projects so forget things that others see as important. What makes you think that he is a sociopath?
Ewww, THAT is exactly what I am going through. I been dating mine for 3 almost 4 month’s and oddly enough he told me from jump street he was a narcissist, arrogant, and a high functioning sociopath was just revealed today because he felt the need to correct me when ai told him I am an empath and he is a sociopath that this os NEVER gonna work out. Sounds crazy writing it out lol. He too identifies as an Aspie. smh He too got into drama/acting – imagine THAT. Ugh, the more I read the more I feel sick and sad and angry. He is fun to be around, took him quite awhile to open up around me. He was self concious in the beginning and defensive about anything embarressing … I’m only the 2nd woman he has been with. (I am 34 and is 30) …. I want to leave and even tried and he has this manulipulative way of changing my mind. And he ALWAYS deflects blame onto me. Even though its his lack of affection that causes problems. Im so sad that I am in love so quickly and that the sex is SO GOOD and there IS an emptional connection… During sex, during conversation we have a link and when others interrupt it – we can physically and emotionally feel the disconnect…. I always tell him his love is like a rollercoaster. I have to leave or he will want to hurt me because he is going to become obsessed with me. I love very hard and I am very sweet to him, if I continue this – he will grow obsessive of me. He already displays jealousy of my attachments with other’s (i.e. family) what a p.o.s. He makes me feel sorry for him bcuz his life sucked horribly bad with abuse but look who is the abuser now 😞😞😞😞😞
Thank you for this blog. I’m only starting to research the topic but believe I was involved with a low-functioning sociopath. There WERE the effects upon myself you mention, such as psychological damage
and damage to my own networks, family, friends, employment etc., but also still a residual effect: One of still ‘not quite being able to believe it’, even though at the time it had almost sent me over the edge, if not for very understanding friends. Obviously, a lot more, but too much to get into here. Anyway, just wanted to say thanks for this. All the best.
You are welcome Robbie welcome to the site!! 🙂
Thank you. Walking away from them is so difficult, isn’t it? 😦
What do I do, I think I’m a low functioning sociopath.. it’s really I dont mean any harm, but sometimes things just dont cross my mind. I’m 25yo and unemployed, my parents work so hard, I know they are but it just dont motivate me to do something about it.
Sometimes I think that it’s okay if my life just end, I dont really care like.. sometimes I feel like I want to have a care, I need to care but I just dont. What do I do, I’m stuck I’m bored, plain life, but too lazy to do something about it to be better, its okay if its just this way, I’m so confused. Ignorant but I dont want to be ignorant, but can’t help to be..
Why do I have to be this way… (Some may say, “you dont have to, you can change, just change”) like how.. can you really change whats in you?
Sorry I said too much, its 1.22am and I’m just lost..
Would you describe a man as a high functioning sociopath or have a personality disorder when he manipulates women for sex? He trolls the internet to meet women. Lies to them and once he uses them for sex he is done with them. If they are great in bed then he manipulates them into thinking that they have a relationship. He has no remorse for their feelings after they realized they’ve been used. He gives just enough attention and attentiveness to think they are the only woman for him but then turns cold.
He lives in my neighborhood and we met while walking my dog. He owns a dog so he would use his dog to lure women. I am physically fit and my male friends say that I am very attractive and they can’t understand why I am wasting time with this man. I could be dating any one else. At first my instinct was to walk away and I should’ve listened. He makes promises of taking me on trips and recently started talking about getting married. Many times I have broke up with him because of his cheating and lies but he always begs me to come back.
Most recently I caught him with a very obese woman at his house that he had invited over for dinner. He claimed that they were just friends but his body language said otherwise. She was picking up on my vibe that he and I were together but he must’ve said something to her for they proceeded to continue their visit, soaking the hot tub watching a movie while he was massaging his feet. Meanwhile, I was being ignored. However just two night ago we were in that hot tub together and had sex in his bed. His room mates know we were together and he in fact told them that they should expect me over more often. In fact it was one of his room mates that opened the door to let me in the house. I had left the party. I have not spoke to him since. His previous girlfriend before me broke of their relationship accusing him of cheating on her but he denies it. Meanwhile he had been dating another woman on and off for 8 years promising marriage to her while seeing me. She knew about me and was okay with it because she refused to have sex with him. However, I learned just recently that he had ended their friendship. I believe he is trying to make me in a relationship that he could have his cake and eat it too. But why sabotage it by inviting over a woman knowing that I could find out about it? If he wants to play the field then why can’t he just be single? There are plenty of women who just want a sex buddy why bother with a relationship at all?
He would insult his ex-girlfriend and female friends/room mate for being over weight yet the women I have caught him cheating are obese with very large breasts. His relationship with his mother is strained yet he appeases her. She is a small petite women that is not obese and has small breasts.
I think it’s interesting how consequential the size of the women he is cheating with is to you (it wouldn’t be the same with everyone). I’m just about sure this is why flaunting them to you is his chosen weapon. He will wear you down with your own weakness/element of issues, etc. I’m not saying he’s not being a j@ck@ss (he is), or that he isn’t trying to get you to make some compromises and bend to his will (he is). But, judging from my own experience, there may be elements that are being reflected to you about yourself that you might want to think more about.
Thanks for your response. Although I didn’t think of it as my weakness but it could be. I know that his previous girlfriend was willing to bind to his will however he used the fact that she was over weight to dump her after 8 years. I found it odd that he would flaunt this obese woman in front of me and his room mates after ridiculing his over weight ex and room mate but his mind is not logical. We only live a few blocks away so it is easy for me to tell that someone is over and he has an open door policy that most of his friends and neighbors pop in. I have stopped by almost every day while I was out walking me dog. Sometimes I would take his dog with mine to the park so for me to arrive at his house unannounced wouldn’t be unusual.
I was married to an addict so I know the patterns and understand what I need to do to get out of this relationship. Since we live close to each other It is harder because his womanizing is not legal and I can’t have him thrown in jail so I can break the cycle. I may need an intervention perhaps move away.
There is not an edit button. So I apologize for the typos.
Hi, My name is Danny, I believe I am a sociopath, I cant exactly describe if I am a high or low functioning sociopath cause I have not yet tried what sort of destruction I am capable of, I do know I am capable great destruction.
I read pretty much all the posts here and including the entire article. I have studied counselling (BSc Hons), I am capable of manipulating anyone I know or have come across, deception, lies, made up stories, manipulation of famous quotes by famous people comes natural to me, its like I have pre-functioning lie producing factory in my mind, Do I always lie? well read on.
SO FOR THE REASON OF MY POSTING THIS COMMENT HERE:
is less to brag about it all and more with may be there should be our side of story.. I am a 29 year old men, I am 6ft tall, fairly built and may be slightly attractive in traditional standard, I have an IQ of 167, I have slept with over 110 Girls/Women, I earn between 38-43k (British Pound), I am kind, helpful towards people I know or care about, I am a extremely patient and a great listener But at the same time, I am blunt, harsh and always very straight to point as long as I am not hurting someone’s feeling with my words or actions, who doesn’t deserve it, and mostly the smartest guy in the room but I prefer being quite and observant, most of you who are reading this probably already calling me or thinking I am an arrogant arse hole, but I am being as honest and forthcoming as possible to perhaps explain a little bit of our (sociopaths) side of the story,
Here are the things I don’t do:
I am not blood sucking freeloader, I do not and never have been in any relation romantic or otherwise to rip people off for financial gain.
I have not been in long term relation for 3 years therefore I do have a lot of one night stand and I often go out purely seeking pleasure BUT it does not mean I break hearts or cheat on girls, If I am in a relation with anyone, even for two weeks I would not sleep or have affair with another girl. I treat girls with utmost respect even if I don’t appreciate their views and ways, for instance we all big-headed twats, think they deserve all the happiness in the world while being harsh, cruel, racist or offensive towards anyone average looking or below average, yet I still treat them like princesses and tolerate their behavior and thats not only for sex but thats just the moral code I live by (I know pretty fucked up don’t worry I know)
I like to think I am good friends as all my friends know I am always there for each and every one of them, in fact any feud or rivalry of a friend I take it very personally, if someone screw around or hurt any of my friend or family, I would go to great length to hurt them back in ways there never could possibly imagine (given they deserve it, if my friend\family are at wrong then I’d likely not do that)
I am capable of reading almost imminently what sort of person I am talking to in matter of minutes, I do use that to my advantage whether I am looking for a partner to have fun with, going for a small business venture or simply any activity on social life, for instance: picking up a girl in mall/party/clubbing I do learn as much as I can about them which comes natural from body language. dressing style, accent, confidence and their social skill, all of which help me determine, what would she be interested in, what she would like or not like etc, don’t get me wrong I do get rejected but in over 100+ attempts in last couple of years alone I have only been rejected less than 20 times and out of those 20 times I manage to still convince 18 of them to either give out their number or take mine. My point is again not bragging but simply stating out the fact what I am capable of YET I don’t change my accent, become someone that I am not, I do not lie about my profession, I do not pretend to be rich even if I know that something a girl would be interested in, I also don’t as recently heart broken man to gain sympathy or win a soft corner.
like I said and mentioned twice I do not hurt people for fun, take advantage of them financially or simply because I can, in fact I have a Robin Hood complex sometime I find myself getting involve in other people business if I know I can help them.
I am capable of empathy but not towards everyone, I am twisted so I do not take anyone’s word for anything, even a most humble gesture to me is suspicious and I am always looking for reasons behind someone kindness etc. In fact I am most twisted person I have ever met and in fact I have been pretending to be normal pretty much all my life, acting as I am not as smart and dumb sometimes, letting people win arguments, and everything to stay under the radar, as except friends, family and some colleagues I am just an ordinary guy, to whom who truly know what I am capable of I am The Mentalist and the problem solver no matter the issue (though half the time I have no clue how to help them)
I probably can go on and share few experiences and venture of my life but I am probably being irritatingly boring to most of you, therefore I will quit my life story. but after reading the article where it says almost ALL OF US SOCIOPATHS are extremely dangerous (I agree), always lying, deceptive, we do not have remorse or incapable of apathy, thats something I do not agree upon as not all of us are just selfish blood sucking twats with means to just do harm.
I am subscribing to this page and article with email alert so I wanna offer if any of you have any question, curiosity, confusion or simply wanna know something about me or my kind (lol) please just reply to me here I am willing and would like answer any and all queries, question etc.
TO ADMIN: Perhaps I can make my own topic/article/post to offer people to understand us better and answer any relevant questions.
Danny Sid
You seem to be catching a lot of heat for your post. As the sociopath I am falling in love with would say, “Simple Mind’s.” I’m intrigued only because my boyfriend would post the same kind of response. He is faithful and devoted and would rather be brash and blunt instead lie, lying is beneath him like many other thing’s lol. However, he is not a romancer/ womanizer. I am only the 2nd woman he has been with. The first one physically abused him and cheated on him but she was his first love💁. He has has been very up front about what he is to me. I believe it was to run me off so as not to disrupt his routine life. He says he has Aspergers (and they typically have many issue’s with routine and such as well being very blunt and faithful) but I am gifted at reading people and I figured him out quite quickly, before he thought I would and things he didn’t want to divulge yet. I am fascinated with the “mind f***” he gives. It interests me… To my own demise. He is attracted to my intelligence, my wit, and my dominance/the sex. I am attracted to his defect (lol), his high IQ, and the sex. I feel quite sick and twisted admitting this. However, I am weird and I make no apologies for being in love with the weird and those who are weirder. He tells me he has no emotions and simulates emotions – he often refers to himself as a machine… Sometimes in frustration and other times in somber reflection. My heart bleeds for him. His doesn’t bleed for anyone. Lol Im so screwed because what should scare me – turns me on. I have only recently threatened/wrote a break up letter to him and after only 3 1/2 month’s he took it hard. He got drunk and bounced from text messaged that stated he is a Wolf and will not be a martyr for love, to pmease don’t leave him and he doesn’t understand what I want. Which is affection. I’m an extremely emotional person. An empath of the worst kind, he is my natural predator being a high functioning sociopath (as he self proclaims) smh I don’t know what he gets from me that benefits him besides great sex, an emotional bond, it does exist – he seems to FEEL when I’m doing something I shouldn’t, we orgasm at the same time (which takes me a long time to do) he let’s his guard down for mere moments and I see fear, him falling in love, obsession, scary shit. I don’t kniw whether he can be loved, or if I should run like hell! Seriously. He functions, he works a low paying job, is VERY dedicated and ethical, follows the rules, lives at home, doesn’t go out to party or socialize, has but doesn’t like it. He loves his family and friends fiercly, he would hurt others for them I’m sure. He is a nerd, I love that. Im his blonde bombshell and although I know just based on his response of “I’m never gonna do better than you in my entire life!” that I have him under my thumb to an extent – it still unerves me because it is a toxic manipulative relationship we weave. I honeslty wonder if he can truly love me. I feel he can, but at the same time – it would be at great cost to me. I also think he is trying to get me pregnant for what reason I do not know. He self loathes (due to the physical abuse from older brother, ex gf, and emotional from mother) yet has a high opinion of himself due to his intellect and good facial features. He is highly self aware and has analyzed himself. I believe he imprints on “disabilities” and or diseases to make up reasons for his behavior or lack of normal feelings/behaviors. He rages, and warned me of them in the very beginning but I didn’t realize what a head case I really had on my hands 😕 now, I love and desire him and the world stops when we’re together but I fear that growing and him becoming violent towards those I love. If I got pregnant THAT possessiveness would be exalted I’m sure. He is sly, quick witted, extremely smart, has many, many , many masks… He told me he doesn’t know who he is without the masks 😢 I knew that anyway. Is there hope? He has been honest and forthright for the most part, mainly because he can see my love in my eye’s. smh I’m so screwed. I td him we should be friend’s he don’t want that. He wants my allegiance lol yet doesn’t know how to show affection💁 Help if you can. Sorry I sound so love sick and twisted… I am though.
Hi, My name is Sid, I believe I am a sociopath, I cant exactly describe if I am a high or low functioning sociopath cause I have not yet tried what sort of destruction I am capable of, I do know I am capable great destruction.
I read pretty much all the posts here and including the entire article. I have studied counselling (BSc Hons), I am capable of manipulating anyone I know or have come across, deception, lies, made up stories, manipulation of famous quotes by famous people comes natural to me, its like I have pre-functioning lie producing factory in my mind, Do I always lie? well read on.
SO FOR THE REASON OF MY POSTING THIS COMMENT HERE:
is less to brag about it all and more with may be there should be our side of story.. I am a 29 year old men, I am 6ft tall, fairly built and may be slightly attractive in traditional standard, I have an IQ of 167, I have slept with over 110 Girls/Women, I earn between 38-43k (British Pound), I am kind, helpful towards people I know or care about, I am a extremely patient and a great listener But at the same time, I am blunt, harsh and always very straight to point as long as I am not hurting someone’s feeling with my words or actions, who doesn’t deserve it, and mostly the smartest guy in the room but I prefer being quite and observant, most of you who are reading this probably already calling me or thinking I am an arrogant arse hole, but I am being as honest and forthcoming as possible to perhaps explain a little bit of our (sociopaths) side of the story,
Here are the things I don’t do:
I am not blood sucking freeloader, I do not and never have been in any relation romantic or otherwise to rip people off for financial gain.
I have not been in long term relation for 3 years therefore I do have a lot of one night stand and I often go out purely seeking pleasure BUT it does not mean I break hearts or cheat on girls, If I am in a relation with anyone, even for two weeks I would not sleep or have affair with another girl. I treat girls with utmost respect even if I don’t appreciate their views and ways, for instance we all big-headed twats, think they deserve all the happiness in the world while being harsh, cruel, racist or offensive towards anyone average looking or below average, yet I still treat them like princesses and tolerate their behavior and thats not only for sex but thats just the moral code I live by (I know pretty fucked up don’t worry I know)
I like to think I am good friends as all my friends know I am always there for each and every one of them, in fact any feud or rivalry of a friend I take it very personally, if someone screw around or hurt any of my friend or family, I would go to great length to hurt them back in ways there never could possibly imagine (given they deserve it, if my friend\family are at wrong then I’d likely not do that)
I am capable of reading almost imminently what sort of person I am talking to in matter of minutes, I do use that to my advantage whether I am looking for a partner to have fun with, going for a small business venture or simply any activity on social life, for instance: picking up a girl in mall/party/clubbing I do learn as much as I can about them which comes natural from body language. dressing style, accent, confidence and their social skill, all of which help me determine, what would she be interested in, what she would like or not like etc, don’t get me wrong I do get rejected but in over 100+ attempts in last couple of years alone I have only been rejected less than 20 times and out of those 20 times I manage to still convince 18 of them to either give out their number or take mine. My point is again not bragging but simply stating out the fact what I am capable of YET I don’t change my accent, become someone that I am not, I do not lie about my profession, I do not pretend to be rich even if I know that something a girl would be interested in, I also don’t as recently heart broken man to gain sympathy or win a soft corner.
like I said and mentioned twice I do not hurt people for fun, take advantage of them financially or simply because I can, in fact I have a Robin Hood complex sometime I find myself getting involve in other people business if I know I can help them.
I am capable of empathy but not towards everyone, I am twisted so I do not take anyone’s word for anything, even a most humble gesture to me is suspicious and I am always looking for reasons behind someone kindness etc. In fact I am most twisted person I have ever met and in fact I have been pretending to be normal pretty much all my life, acting as I am not as smart and dumb sometimes, letting people win arguments, and everything to stay under the radar, as except friends, family and some colleagues I am just an ordinary guy, to whom who truly know what I am capable of I am The Mentalist and the problem solver no matter the issue (though half the time I have no clue how to help them)
I probably can go on and share few experiences and venture of my life but I am probably being irritatingly boring to most of you, therefore I will quit my life story. but after reading the article where it says almost ALL OF US SOCIOPATHS are extremely dangerous (I agree), always lying, deceptive, we do not have remorse or incapable of apathy, thats something I do not agree upon as not all of us are just selfish blood sucking twats with means to just do harm.
I am subscribing to this page and article with email alert so I wanna offer if any of you have any question, curiosity, confusion or simply wanna know something about me or my kind (lol) please just reply to me here I am willing and would like answer any and all queries, question etc.
TO ADMIN: Perhaps I can make my own topic/article/post to offer people to understand us better and answer any relevant questions.
Sid
What makes you think that you are a sociopath? If you are a sociopath and therefore a compulsive pathological liar why would anyone believe your answers? What disturbs me, is that you are a counsellor? Therefore your clients think you are helping them with empathy. But realistically you can only fake empathy. Respond to people by telling them what they want to hear, by mirroring them reading them accurately. While you might be able to offer upr .. how fake is that? Can you really be with the client? Sociopaths in counselling setting I find disturbing 😦
Your mind is pretty limited and lack the ability to truly grasp how the sociopath mind works, had I known you in real life and after knowing that if you have a remote idea about who sociopaths are and their capabilities, would in million years I ever tell you what I am.
You have been hurt by one therefore your acceptance will remain like a narrow pipe line for everyone who disagree with your views, please accept my apology I am not calling your arrogant or ignorant for that matter but simply a emotionally hurt which is the hardest to jump back from. Anyhow enough of your views analysis. I am pretty sure you will happen to disagree with me entirely .
Its a clandestine way of life, you might never see another sociopath ever telling you about his ability or disability whatever you call it, I am just trying to emphasize on the point where we are made out to be the monsters (rightly deserve in most cases) but there are those of us who are not fit onto your criteria of Sociopaths lore.
We dont have secret societies, or panty sniffing clubs in secretly organize locations (no offence) we are human beings and like everyone else we have choice between to do or not to do.
I have a best friend quite possibly the smartest friend I have and 4th smartest person I personally know in this world, he has been the player from his teenage hood till now and have slept with more woman than I can count (that I know of) he cheats, he does one night stand, lie and does all kind of shameful act for sexual pleasure but he is the most loyal friend all his friend would say, served in military, loves his family and is one of the most helpful human being I know, my professional opinion is he has Hypersexual Disorder (HSD) but does that make him Sociopath cause he lies for Sex?
I am being a counselor or shrink is disturbing for you, do you know any counselor or psychiatrist in real life, does it not gives you chills up your spine when they are staring at you, looking right through you, analyzing every word you say! So its amazing how you know something about sociopaths and not have a basic clue which profession most sociopath work prefer, not talking about bloodsucking low life con artists but enlightened and competent kind. The university I got my HCPC degree from I was the youngest student there, and knowing who I am I can read my kind in 2 minutes conversation at any topic, and what I learned was almost each and every individual in that class if some sort of sociopath or in making.
So next time you see a counselor for any purposes or you have one as a neighbor perhaps, read the clear sign and you will understand us better, we are not all lying cheating and deluded lost souls.
I did expect you to be smarter though, sadly your too narrow minded yet, with high hopes more you will learn about us more clear you will become how flawed you were at your conclusion.
Ps: most people who read or comment on your blog are possible victims, undetermined whether or not their supposed deceptor is even a sociopath, so think of it like a studying a rare leopard found only in K2 Mountain while sitting in Mojave Desert. (excuse any typos or mistakes I may have made, I didn’t have time to read through all before posting as my mind currently is all over the places.)
Most people who write here are victims as the site is called ‘dating a sociopath’ so would think that would be fairly obvious. You are right partially, it is alarming that socios work in psychiatric/counselling field. Although not surprising at all. After all they are good at reading people.
With regard to my ignorance, is it ignorance if so many victims understand it and relate? Perhaps a victims view of a situation is different to a sociopaths?
All sociopaths lie. …… You saying that they don’t is merely an illusion.
It is the choices that we make which define us. I am a sociopath, ‘aftms’ is clearly a sociopath too – with delusions of grandeur, typical narcissistic characteristics,etc. Anyway, I used to be a bit of an arsehole myself, although, the experiences that shaped my sociopathy also shaped my humanity. I never really was a complete ‘arsehole’, but the capacity was there (as for everyone) and it was exemplified through many – but not most – of my actions. I have taught myself how to think in a more morally adjusted way, i have enlightened myself and developed a more rational and efficient form of empathy as a compromise to the type ordinary people ignorant to their fortune already possess. As a result of my self development through the years (I am 21) I have been able to feel guilt towards any kind of wrong doing I could possibly do, and therefore have avoided immorality for my own sake. I can lie effortlessly, it’s easy – I prefer not to do it, and I simply do NOT lie to my girlfriend. Honesty is the foundation of a trusting relationship, and me and my love do not tolerate anything less than that. I am in love with my girl, have been for over a year now, I’ve been faithful, honest – even at times when it made me look bad. I hate that I feel numb, my general lack of emotion makes me feel empty, dead. I do feel though. i have pushed myelf to understand, widen my perspective, enhance my intellect and my capacity thereof – that, together with my life experiences: I have helped more people than you can imagine, and not as a career, quite simply because although i do not FEEL empathy, i sure as hell feel for myself, i imagine what it would be like to be in a situation that somebody else is in, recreate it, so that i am able to connect to them. Helping others, being there for them, and then knowing that they will do the same for others fills me with hope, and a fleeting sensation of vitality – or at least connection. It shouldn’t disturb you that a sociopath is a counsellor, i personally would like to do some voluntary counselling for children, so that they wouldn’t have to grow up into something like myself, something dead. What i do find disturbing though, is that I have managed to grow so much – I used to be very narcissistic too, like the counsellar whom you replied to (an IQ of 167 is not very impressive btw :P), but I feel like I’m approaching contentment – finally… Why do I seem like the only one? I haven’t yet come across any other sociopath of my kind. Although that shouldn’t surprise me – the detachment of the ego and the pursuit of illumination are truly seldom in our world, for empaths, sociopaths, and psychopaths alike.
‘Self development through the years’… ‘I am 21’.
. I loved that part 🙂
It is helpful to have another perspective on the situation thank you.
Based on your statements, you are NOT a sociopath. I seriously doubt that a true sociopath would even bother making such a post, because they simply do not care.
If it makes you feel any better, you do seem to have a little narcissism going on.
Apparently if you are a deceptive liar you are a sociopath?
There must be something else.
No I would say more lack of conscience, empathy, guilt remorse or shame. Also liars and deceptive.
What is your definition of lack of conscience.
Someone who has no guilt empathy remorse or shame. Just no conscience. That nagging feeling in the back of your mind. The need to put things right. The feeling bad if you do something to hurt someone else. Just thought for someone else rather than your own needs.
PG I think what you seem to lack here is the wisdom to truly grasp the understanding of deceptive mind, you asked the silliest question only a child would ask, you said “All sociopaths lie. …… You saying that they don’t is merely an illusion?”
well answer is ALL HUMAN lie, I have seen supposed Saints who lie on constant bases, Teachers who live to their Students, loving and caring husband lie to their wives for mistakes they have made, so does the most loyal wives.. Does that make them Sociopath.
So your argument became null base on your own assumption of all deceptive liars lack Empathy.
Here’s an example if you are willing to listen and try to understand where I am coming from: Lets say per argument sake “your neighbor is a cruel man, who beats your dog regularly, then one day he kills your dog, you call the police on him he gets nothing in the name of self defense” its very easy to hate him from here on out, unless you’re some pious religious saint, which of course you’re not. So you hate him and cant stand him cause every time you look at him he reminds you of your dog who you dearly loved. Then one day you see him being attacked by bunch of bees, you stand there and watch and some how in fact you enjoy it, cause you feel like justice is being served, you say to yourself he had it coming, he’s a cruel cruel man and he absolutely deserve it.
There, right at the moment, that’s lack of empathy, in fact that you are glad on his misery which then makes you the cruel person, yet you cant bring yourself to feel sorry for him, because you CHOOSE not to feel sorry for him and that is well justified for many reason.
Now the point I was trying to make there, was very simple, just like any practice, apathy or empathy are emotional response we choose or choose not to act upon, it isn’t a feeling of freight or anger which we do not have control over.. which then proves Sociopath can choose to feel or not feel the need to show empathy.
So your judgement of them being incapable of feeling the empathy was ridiculous on its own, Everybody lie for personal gain, some feel bad about it some don’t, Sociopaths are just better liars and they are just more selfish which allows them to work beyond the boundaries of conscience, all of that because they choose to be that way, not because they’re incapable of feelings, conscience, remorse or empathy.. but simply they choose not to feel it, but there are those of us who choose to feel those emotions and despite its one of the hardest thing to do, we choose to self sacrifice for something we believe in, not because we are blinded by devotion or overwhelming feelings but because we choose to be good and not selfish.
Even now if you feel you are not satisfied and your stance of “Oh sociopaths are evil and all bad and the world needs to be rid of them” then dear its not sociopath who needs help, you do, that’d be my professional assessment too.
If you choose to counter my argument regardless then do it by explaining yourself in details, is to why I’m wrong about the neighbor/dog scenario, or why you are more sure than I am to about SPs are incapable of feelings, and prove it by facts and not rhetorical phrases like “oh I know socios are bad coz I have first hand experience or i have seen enough”
Will wait for your sensible response of course. Again, be thorough.
The first five things all fit into the same catagory and with deception and lies, well, you can’t have one without the other. So, to put it bluntly they have no conscience and are deceptive?
The real question is what is your definition of human.
That’s a stupid question everyone Is human.
That was a stupid reply. Mentally, not physically. Human characteristics have been taught to us, unlike other species who have instinctive characteristics. Since you need a more explained answer, what are our instinctive characteristics? The popular vote on sociopaths describe them as subhuman. If their characteristics match ours, then I would not reccomend treating them treating them like monsters, no matter how disrespectful they may be. Doing so makes you just as bad.
Might I add, anyone who has pro probably views them as a sociopath, as they do you. I don’t mean you or and direct comment, I am just making a general observation.
The question is relevant, but mostly what do you “believe” it means
My marriage is in falling apart. My wife cheated on me. I’m not sure wether she is getting lonely because I started working night shifts or she has no empathy or remorse for me or our family. My oldest daughter, Julia, who is soon moving out, won’t dare speak to her mother, and my wife doesn’t seem to care the slightest bit. My 8 year old son, Kyle, thinks that I am to blame, and he tells me to go away when I walk in his room, saying that its my fault mommy likes someone else. This is how I found out. When I asked her what he was talking about she looked nervous for a second and then told me that the cable guy who came over last week was who kyle was talking aboutand he probably mistook the situation for something else. It was a lie of course or i wouldn’t be here. Julia confirmed my suspicion telling me that no, there was no cable guy, especially not our usual one, but there was a man who was kissing her. Julia has always been a shy girl, and she was afraid to tell me. Apparently it wasn’t the first time this has happened.
My working late has probably given my wife the chance to sneak around more. Not to mention Julia being out of the house more often due to her new “freedom”, and Kyle attending a sleepover almost every other day paves way for things like this.
Oh look at me! The more I think about it the more I believe it. She is isn’t she! A person with no empathy or remorse. She has bought expensive items on my card without even asking me, resulting in an unexpectedly large payment on my part. When Julia’s appendix burst, she didn’t seem concerned for her in any way. She smiles at someone’s death or suffering although i don’t think she knows i see her do it. She has kept a journal since we were first married eleven years ago, which is written in a stange cipher. The journal has strange and rather disturbing drawings in it. I have been seeing a therapist every week and he told me that the journal was written the way it was out of some type of paranoia. We’re married for Christ’s sake! What is there to be paranoid about! Im a good husband. I would never do anything to hurt her ut she has found countless ways to hurt me mentally and emotionally. My therapist said she maybe a sociopath so i decided to do some research on the topic. That is how i came across this site. There are so many experiences similar to mine and I feel talking to someone with the same issue will aleveiate some of my stress. Someone please respond ASAP. I believe that speaking to someone with a similar issue is much better than a therapist. Thank you to anyone who responds. God bless.
Hi James.
This ISN’T your fault. I dont think that your wife is respecting you. I think that your son is probably lashing out at you, as you are the one that is there. He feels threatened that his mother is going to leave, so he lashes out on you. Again this isn’t your fault. What do you feel from reading peoples stories here. Do you think that possibly she is a sociopath? Whatever it doesn’t sound as if her behaviour is good for your health.
I know its not my fault. I’ve done nothing to deserve this. It’s not lke I’ve ever beaten her or even missed one of our anniversaries or anything like that. Kyle is still very young so I have no reason to be frustrated in any way. I completely understand why he would be mad at me and ill have to explain it to him sooner or later or he’ll hate me for a long time, and he won’t even be certain why. After more extensive research i have come to the conclusion that she may be worse than i thought possibly even a psychopath based on the journal. What do you think about it?
I am practically in tears with her but i need to be strong, especially if she is as i suspect. Thank you for the quick response.
By the way there may be a duplicate of this message. It didnt show that it posted so i decided to rewrite it.if you find the duplicate could you delete it?
I know its not my fault. At the very least she is a sociopath. I understand that Kyle is still very young so i have no reason to be frustrated in any way with him. What i cant get off my mind is the journal. That is the issue for me. She doesn’t know i know about it and it’s weighing on my conscience. I just keep wondering what it says in there. For all i know she could be doing some very dark things that make adultery look okay. I would really like your thoughts on it. And thank you for the quick reply.
You really don’t think there is a need for the war on terror?
No, I don’t I think it was all about oil. Think about it….. what is better, than a war that never ends? How can it end? It isn’t against a country – its a war on terror. What does it thrive on FEAR. How do they control? Through FEAR. This has to be the biggest scam. What happened to Bin Laden? Oh and he was found (but nobody saw the body) as it was disposed in the sea. When did they find him, oh at the same time as the Royal Wedding, oh they quickly slipped that one in. And the World trade centres…. oh they found a passport at the bottom. What is a passport made of? paper, how does a paper document survive – in heat that is so hot, it burns down steel?
Good question though Paula, and one that I would love to have a debate about. I feel quite passionately about it. What about the war with Iraq? I wrote to my government said that I opposed the war with Iraq, they went to war – for what? ….. there was no need to go to war with them. Innocent people were killed. Motive – Oil.
However, as soon as we pulled out the whole country fell to people who are mass murdering people with an ideology similar to ours.
“Parasidic”? I can’t take this article seriously with misspellings like that.
Ooh I hit the d instead of the t…. woah me. Its a blog, not a book!
What is it? Run PG down time, I ask myself why you feel the need eh? If you don’t agree with what’s written here, don’t come here and read it. PG has helped many people including myself with her knowledge, this knowledge gained from life experience and her years of training. I find her info accurate and it certainly made a lot of sense to me, having had past similar experiences, so if you don’t like it, go away, simples. Just because you’re qualified via books, don’t make your word any better than the next persons, in fact, I’d rather go with the word of someone who has actually experienced these things anyday.
Keep up the good work PG you’ve helped so many get their lives back on track, don’t let the minority steer you from your vocation, what you are doing here is wonderful. 🙂
Jen. xxx
I’m glad you did and I know it’s taken incredible strength for you to do so. Don’t take any of that negativity on board, if they have a problem, it’s their problem, not yours. Keep your focus on all the good you’ve achieved so far. Yes we are only human, I totally agree there and same as yourself, I’m only grateful for any help I receive. Think about it, the reaction from them, are your words equipping people eh? Why lash out at you and try to demean your words? You keep writing, like I said, what you are doing here is wonderful and helping many broken souls to mend. 🙂 It’s my pleasure to support you and I will continue to do so, I recognise an earth angel when I see one, 🙂
Have a beautiful day, big hugs your way!
Jen. xxx
Big hugs right back to you Jen!! 🙂 x
Hi Nikki, just to let you know, I’m up and running again. Got a new FB page under my proper name Jenifer Healey. Do you want to add me? Hope all’s well and you’re settled in your new place. Big hugs your way! Jen. XXX. 🙂
Oh please take that sherlock picture down
it makes the blog look ridiculous
less informational and more… fangirl.
its an interesting blog, but it needs some work. Constructive criticism:
1. I understand that its meant to cover the things you need to be cautious of when you know a sociopath, but its a bit one sided.
2. Give a better description of the differences between hi and lo functioning sociopaths, its unclear.
3. Be even more thorough when describing a sociopath, as a few people who have commented seem to think that if someone cheats or even does something as simple as lying qualifies the person as a sociopath. Sometimes they are just broken people.
4. It would be interesting if you wrote the differences between psychopaths and sociopaths, as they are commonly confused.
5. Check the entire blog for typos. I dont think i needed to write that, but oh well.
How is this a lol
please consider it
I definitely feel like I’m a sociopath. I’ve always never cared about other people’s problems. To me, if the problem did not affect me, then it wasn’t important. Everything is like a video game. If I break your car window in the middle of the night, and come up to you in the morning time (taking into account the exact time that I would normally be outside to witness the event), and I claim to you that I saw so and so do this to your car, but you didn’t hear it from me. I know that you would blame that person because you already have disdain for that person. So automatically, your mind would have no problem accusing the person of the crime, simply on the basis that you don’t like them. If the person I claimed to see ended up finding out that I was the one who pin pointed them for the crime, when confronted, I would simply claim that there must be a misunderstanding, when I talked to him, he stated “it must be that fuckin so and so guy. he was the one who said it was you. not me, man”. By doing this, I use the same strategy as before, using your disposition against someone to control the situation without raising an eyebrow towards myself. If worse came to worse, and both people gathered in front of me to question me at the same time, I would simply claim “look, guys, obviously a lot has happened, but I have problems in my life too, and I have too much on my plate already to get involved with this whole ordeal” and that would effectively, and reasonably remove me from the conflict. What would be left is a broken window, and two people who absolutely hate each other now, and I would sit back, play some video games, and smile at the fact that I’m so much smarter than these two idiots and how I can play them like a musical instrument. I take pleasure in knowing that I can out smart someone. It makes me feel like I’m better than them, and the only reason I do it, is because I hate myself, and for good reason too. It’s a destructive circle, that has no end. And also, on an end note, I would make sure to keep an extra close eye on my vehicle for a few months after that, just in case one of the idiots decided to take matters in to their own hands. You wouldn’t be able to get me back, because I would already be expecting you to, and would be prepared to present evidence, and put charges on your ass so fast, you wouldn’t know what hit you. And you think Sociopaths are bad in the real world? Just wait until you meet me in court where technicalities are the rule of the game and you have to prove EVERYTHING. To put it lightly, You’ll be my bitch for the entire trial. I’ll play my cards perfectly. You wouldn’t stand a chance simply because your morals and conscious would hold you back, where as I would limitless.
Don’t you care you cause so much trouble and why don’t you get karma. I wish you would.
Stupid much?
course he doesnt care.
i wouldn’t either.
karma is just a superstition and often used as a representative phrase.
In a sense we’re a little more evolved. Minimal or no emotions or conscience allow for a more limitless lifestyle, get what you want, the art of manipulation. Gotta love it.
You caveman. Get grumpy. Lose control. Life manipulate you.
I think it’s pretty funny. Most things sociopaths do is driven by boredom. When you don’t really care about anything, life gets really boring unless you perform that kind of wizardry.
I was diagnosed twenty years ago. I’m 28 now. I’m high functioning.
These pages always give me a giggle. The DSM never worked because it’s hard to find a sociopath that would give consent to in depth analysis without manipulating the results.
And to be fair- empaths are manipulative just not as conscious of your manipulations. We are. And we have morals- they are our own and not subject to your opinion though some may be the same as yours.
I am motivated by challenge. It’s my drive. People, even those that know me well and what I am, think me a good person. My motives are never altruistic in intent even if the result is communally positive. My reasons are always selfish. I won’t better you at cost of me- but I will better you if it betters myself. Quite simple. And while most are- I am not a liar.
If I lie it is because you asked a question about someone else in a way which could not be subverted with careful wording and I have reason to protect their secrets. I enjoy the challenge in always speaking truthfully. If you ask me properly you will always get a true AND honest answer. It’s more entertaining to speak true words and cause someone to believe a lie with those words than to lie to them– plus it saves my mind having to remember the lie for later.
Do quit trying to lump all sociopaths together. We are as varied as everyone else. We just happen to have the convenient skill of forgoing emotion. High functioning empaths can choose to be emotional but we see no reason to allow such illogical influence in our minds. We understand emotions implicitly- what we do not understand is why empaths are so attached to them that they would allow themselves to go through so much needless trauma. We even understand love more completely. it is an unconditional emotion and for most of you that isn’t possible. We know better than to trust other sociopaths and most empaths pay lip service to love and believe their own lie.
I happen to have met someone that challenges me, fascinates me and is very fun to look at. He fell in love with me knowing what I am. One person on this planet is safe from my manipulation. One person on this planet means more to me than I mean to myself. Attempting to reconcile logic to love is a challenge most sociopaths wouldn’t even consider. But he fascinates me, shocked me when we met, and is physically stunning. I found an empath with a combination of traits I found worthy of compromising my self control for. I love him without reservation… But it is detachable. If it came down to it I would willingly make him hate me if it were in his best interest and not be bothered by the choice or result.
There is one big difference between myself and an empath. It is this;
My mind belongs to me and not those around me. I am free. My choices are real, not illusory. The greatest weapon and tool a human has spends most of its energy at war with itself while my mind is in harmony.
😉
Hmmm…. You say your mind is free? I would say you have less freedom simply as you have to always be on guard secretive that must be hard work… You say you enjoy speaking the truth which means that’s effort not freedom being free is being who you are and accepted and loved for exactly who you are.
Fuck off, you narrow-minded imbecile.
How the hell would you know “Freedom”? People have different views on what they think of it. Don’t go deciding your opinion is fact.
Dear hell, what a cheesy line. Did you pull that from disneychannel?
“Freedom being free is being who you are and accepted and loved for exactly who you are.” I think i just vomited from the shallowness of your response.
I just laughed at your moral outrage!! 🙂
I don’t believe this article to be entirely correct. Sociopathy is a subset of the population that creates diversity. These traits lasted through evolution for a reason. If controlled and properly applied. You very rarely hear comments about the non neural typical people on the autism spectrum. So what’s with the irrational distain for socios here?
Many, if not most, socios do NOT lie for no reason. Psychopaths perhaps. Socios lie if it benefits them, and/or to get what they want. A socio isn’t some histrionic woman crying for attention randomly. If a lie is told, it’s typically advantageous and part of a plan. But it’s typically NOT to have fun at your expense on purpose. Socios don’t waste that kind of time. They simply don’t care.
Which leads me to the next point. Socios don’t (typically, although I can admit there may be a subgroup who will) enjoy getting a ride out of people or a thrill to deceive. They appears to be a common misconception and may explain the unfair attitudes towards socios. The truth is…socios simply don’t CARE that they hurt you/society to get what they want. It’s like a child’s mindset. They see it they want it it’s all about thrm. Think arrested development. And usually, it’s a logical process, not an emotionally charged hate train.
If you look at things logically, you can manage a socio. Now if you want to, of course, is another issue.
A little common sense too goes a long way. If you are a 50 year old overweight wrinkly housewife with 4 kids and an huge inheritance and a handsome unemployed 25 year old man is suddenly trying to move into your house, anyone with common sense would know that equation doesn’t make sense. Now if you accept it for what it is, perhaps it’s more beneficial for both than you think.
Yes it hurts to get “used” by the socio. But odds are, you also “used” them to get a feeling, an emotion, or a status you wanted as well. If you think about it, really sociopathy exists to some extent in all of us. Humans are (usually) selfish by nature.
I like this comment. There is a lot that I agree with. However socios do lie even when there is no need to lie. Even when telling the truth would work out better In their interests. What is also another interesting point I don’t think I have written about yet, is what happens when there is a genuine soul connection? Not the fake soul mate that we know socios are capable of. But a real genuine soul connection … This is an interesting concept too. Can be a learning experience for the sociopath. The thing is about power. Sociopaths like to take power. The trick is not to give it to them. Often there are flaws that go back to childhood. Of hiding being the norm within childhood. What Is important is not who they are. But how their behaviour affects you. A regular non socio can also cause damage and have their own flaws. It really depends on the person.
I’m a diagnosed sociopath. “Rules were made to be broken” I rarely lie. I don’t give a fuck if the truth hurts or offends, in fact if it does i enjoy it. I manipulate people by telling them what they want to hear, i pander to their vanity and their ego……that’s their (your) problem, not mine!
The few people in my life who i do love, that love is unconditional. I also give to the homeless, donate to charity, walk the neighbours dog, help old ladies across the fucking road…….
Your blog is a joke. and so are you.
Thank you for your comments!! 🙂
I’m in a general state of rage, asshole. So you can go to hell with your shallowness.
fix your shitty blog.
Why are you so angry?
Happened across this and found it amusing so of course couldn’t help but to reply. I am a diagnosed HFS. I agree with a lot of what you say but figured I’d throw my views of the world in to see if it helps you get a better idea of how we function (or at least me.) My everyday encounters start with a quick up down for body language triggers as well as any emotional responses to anything I may ask or say. I then file away anything I discovered that may be of use in the future into my mind and continue the encounter. While I am doing this I am constantly monitoring my own body language so as not to reveal my intentions, I also do this so as not to seem to aggressive or weak. I also make a habit of parroting (if you scratch your chin I’ll do the same a few seconds after) as to get you subconsciously comfortable with me. After a couple such conversations I will begin to formulate a story based on what you want to hear or what you may find interesting as to gain a small amount of trust and admiration. After a few days/encounters like this I will place your piece on my mental chess board and that’s where the fun begins. Depending on what type of person you are and how far I can bend you before you break will ultimately determine in what way I will use you, wether for financial gains, sexual, as a sword or shield for my defense or attack on others when needed. It’s normally at this point I’ll make the decision on wether you are worth keeping as a friend or as a expendable piece to be sacrificed when your usefulness has ended. Obviously I end up with far more pawns then friends. If your a friend I will back off the manipulation (other then when necessary to keep you fooled) as I don’t want to reveal my play and lose your piece entirely. If I deem you a sacrificial pawn, I’ll use you up and discard you when I find you to be most useful, not before anything you may have to offer me is in my grasp of course. When it comes to meeting someone I actually find myself liking enough to consider attaching to long term I am completely different in my approach though. I generally do care (maybe not emotionally) and want to see you happy as the happier you are the more you will try to make me happy so it has advantages for both parties. I won’t lie and say I have never cheated as I have but will generally only do so when the logical choice is that the new person has more to offer me then you. (you would be surprised at how rare that actually is by the way ) I will routinely sacrifice my pawns off to keep you protected and safe and will violently defend you if need be. (Though I’d honestly rather not get my own hands dirty, after all that’s what the pawns are for!) Though most will look at this with disgust (and I could agree it is warranted) maybe some will also see what disadvantages in life I have. This routine is automatic anymore even if I do not mean it to be. I routinely find myself envious of your ability to legitimately feel emotions as I am curious as to what it may be like though after a few moments I normally snap out of that state of mind and realize what an advantage I have over you “normal” people as I can assess everything around me in a logical and non emotional way. Logic is much simpler especially when your not impeded by thoughts of what others may think or how they may feel about something. All in all I own what I am. I do get a sick sense of pleasure when I emotionally hurt people I will admit that, but even you “normal” people do and you can’t say you don’t as I have experienced you all backstabbing each other first hand and then bragging later. If you have any questions for me feel free to ask, I don’t mind responding and honestly enjoy the truth as I feel it hurts much more then lies ever could. Main point of this (beyond a slight inner look at my mind and how it functions) is not all of us are horrid at relationships. I have been in three major ones in my life all lasting four years or more. But I digress, have a wonderful summer and again, feel free to respond and ask me things. I’d be more then happy to answer. Farewell for now.
Your first part is exactly how I usually win at a poker game. And, all in all, you and I think fairly similarly. especially since I was diagnosed High Functioning as well. Quite interesting.
Oh also, this whole thing you replied to someone else regarding how we always lie even when it isn’t necessarily needed, is completely your bias opinion. Do we lie, yes, you could even argue that we lie constantly due to us acting and imitating emotions to fit into a social setting, but how would we be capable of working and maintaining even our few friendships without doing so? I can tell you when I am in a complete “sociopathic state” my friends (even those that know what I am) say I’m not fun to be around cause there is nothing that indicates my interest in the activity at hand without my acting “normal”. Anyway back to your opinion, (it is of course just an opinion and even if it is completely false your entitled to it) I tell the truth way more then I lie as I find it more fun to watch people be affected by the truth. Plus the added bonus of not having to keep up on the lie. Figured I’d add that in asbo forgot to address it in my original post.
Interesting turn around. With as effed up as this world is currently, I can imagine how many more people are scared of the truth than the lie.
Its a great blog you have here. But, unfortunately, most of it’s extremely opinionated. Yes, there are some sociopaths, whom I’ve met, who are generally able to fall into the category of destructive sociopathological tendencies. I consider those to be Apollyon Sociopaths (ancient greek for destroyer). However, with that said, I am a sociopath, and I’m coming to terms with it. in reality, its not easy to be a sociopath. I’m also an atheist. What this means is that I am outcasted for two different reasons, and with people who have no remorse towards me for doing so. Already dealing with abandonment issues, it makes how i treat people…well, more on the Apollyon side, which isn’t where i want to be. In reality, I’m a High Functioning Sociopath. No, not often do I blatantly lie, and it depends on the person whom i lie to. Family, friends, family of friends. they are off limits. I have developed morals, something you think to be impossible for us to have. I have falsified empathy to an extent, that it’s a subconscious lie. I can keep myself in check using my morals, and only lie to get something when i need it, not when I just want it. I consider this type of sociopath Arkité Sociopath. (Ancient Greek for Builder). I use builder here, because it’s not all about trying to use people. I have lied in order to make other people be in better regards than they were before. I’m sure there are other sociopaths like me. But my brain has been damaged in a very special way. I used to have an extreme amount of empathy. More than anyone I have still met. Yet, due to many more traumatic life experiences, it have completely evicted itself from me, leaving unusable spots in my head where my empathy was. I recall it through a lie.
Point: Not all sociopaths are bad people. Not all sociopaths can help themselves. Not all sociopaths are the most immoral on the block. I’ve met people who have far less empathy than i do in reality, and they don’t even have a mental disorder than i could pick out. (I study psychology, and use my knowledge to pinpoint with remarkable precision what mental disorder they have). If you’re a sociopath, and are smart, you can be an Arkité Sociopath.
Not all sociopaths lie and cheat and are as crazy as you make them sound. Yes there is that type and it is most unfortunate that the majority of you have come across these sorts of people but a lot of sociopaths are actually good people. Im dating one now and have known him for many years prior to our relationship he has always been a good person to me and everyone around him. Although he has traits anfandalities that would classify him as a sociopath, it doesnt make him a bad person. He has if anything given me life rather than take it. Im just saying open your minds to what could be rather than what you saw. Just like any other human being there is good and bad and although they may have bad thoughts ultimately its up to them to act upon them or work on it.
All sociopaths lie are manipulative and deceptive.
You are a very broken sad little woman. Your responses show little to no creativity an are repetitive and predictable. It’s no wonder one of us ripped you down so easily. I wish I was there to witness it. Oh how amusing that would have been. Happy New year!
😂😂😂😂 is that best you have to say?? Sigh… yes its repetitive so is your behaviour. Sad
That’s untrue and insulting! It’s a disorder and you may choose not to act upon it.
This place is rather ironic. Have any of you tried to empathize with a sociopath? If not, you’re even worse than us. I understand that most of the folk here have had bad experiences on the subject, but that doesn’t mean it’s right to hate everyone that falls in that category. We can’t empathize. We can still feel emotion, however dulled it may be. Although the irony is funny, being treated this way doesn’t make someone feel good. This site is labeling an entire group of people as a disease because of something we literally cannot do. I lie and manipulate, yes, but it’s not because I’m trying to hurt people. Why would any sociopath tell you the truth of who they are if this is how you ‘good’ people react to it?
It might not be of importance to you, but your actions ruin peoples lives. It might be ok for you to lie to people. You know, that doesn’t sit right with me.
I believe that I am a highly functioning sociopath. Even when I take tests, I find myself lying because it really depends what I would gain from doing whatever it is. I might give money to the homeless, but only if I had a ton of money for myself to make it feel like it wasn’t really nothing, no dent in my wallet and I know the guy is about to buy cigs with it. I feel jipped when I donate money. in relationships I am water, pour me into a container and I will fill it. I’m a ditto. I don’t know how to love, love frightens me and there’s no telling how I will act when I am overwhelmed by the emotions of others that I just don’t care about. I usually have anxiety attacks that end with me going to the er, where I play all of the doctors and nurses, and once I’m no longer in panic mode I want to leave and my demeanor will change very quickly. I know that my rage is right under the surface, depends what you do to provoke me. What is an okay response. I am aware of my behavior, other people really don’t see it I think. They just think I’ve had too much caffeine but really I am trying to give you enough information about myself to justify and protect me from being spotted as a thing. I don’t feel human, I dissociate a lot. Everyday is different I can be or do anything with the right influences. I am going into law too, I will be about to graduate and I can’t wait because despite all of this I’m very fair. I believe in paying for things that are wrong to the majority of people, things that are not justified in any way. It’s the only way you can rewire someone’s mind to be good. I am a nice sociopath, I try not to con but I know if I want it bad enough it’s mine. I do care, because I would hate to be alone but I don’t care because I will never wake up in your body I will always be stuck in mine so I have to do what I have to do to survive ..I think of you as an accessory to the picture that is my life. I’m shallow, I only go after very attractive and intelligent men. That is the closest thing I will ever feel to love is looking at someone I think is beautiful like a sculpture and having control over them. I am not evil . I just don’t feel like others do because I have been desensitized to violence and sex growing up. mainly sex, which is an act of liove. I love sex but I hate hearing abou it in movies or anything because I get envious of what I am supposed to feel or what other people are enjoying the feeling of whole ness to another. I just don’t get it. I live for me and that’s what attracts men to me ..they see me as a go getter I dependent woman but really I have chosen to be this way. I could try to understand if I wanted to, I just have a deep seated rage and unaddressed needs from my childhood that are solidifyin g everyday they go unmet that has devoured me of the ability to accept others as a human and not just mine.
My boyfriend thinks he is a sociopath. But he only has some things kind of related to one.
The lack of conscience
He does not have empathy or sympathy, but he does feel bad for thing he does. Mostly when it comes to me. I honestly wouldnt put him in that category but he thinks he is. So I dont really know what to do…
If he truly feels bad for what he has done, then he has empathy and is not a sociopath.
It sounds like he may just be an A**hole.
I do not agree with the comment:
“Will be sobbing, and wiping his face as if there were tears. But there will be none.”
My ex (50 year old female) could instantly turn the real tears on and off. Only sometimes she would ad a fake “Boo hoo hoo”.
The only time her tears appeared to be real was during one of her narcissistic rages.
BTW: She did not even cry at either of her parents funeral.
It is quite the most incredible thing to observe. I will never forget him crying and wailing…. but there was something that wasn’t ‘quite right’. Indeed, it wasn’t right. Crocodile tears.
Yes, my bff got involved with this guy 18 years who has every characteristic as described in this article. I was able to warn her just in time . I am glad she did not have any physical intimacy with him . He emotionally cheated her by playing with her feelings , lying to her about not being with other girls , doing stuff on parking lots with bunch of girls, and spending a night over at their place etc . A liar in all respects . He was full of himself and I am sure he never brought my friend anything nor wished her for any occasion He made crazy excuses and did not even have the balls to break up with her and kept her hanging for the longest time.I am so glad that his friend spilled the beans about his evil deeds and we put an end to it. Of course he is probably playing a victim now. I hate him fir playing with her feelings and I wish she was not so naïve