Tag Archives: anxiety

Why the stress of dating a sociopath can make you ill!

Have you ever wondered WHY WHY WHY did you create so much drama? Most normal people have relationships, and yes, there are the events in life which cause upset. Life isn’t always perfect. Sometimes there are huge stresses in life, that we as humans have to deal with. That’s life right?


Sociopath’s for some reason, thrive on drama. If there isn’t any drama, they will create some. They do this for a number of reasons

  • Boredom
  • To test your reactions
  • To gain attention
  • Deflection from the truth

Drama can be two things

  • Stressful
  • Exciting

When you first meet the sociopath, he can seem very exciting. Everything is new, and there is huge potential for a big and bright future. As the relationship wears on, this drama starts to shift from exciting, to stressful.

You realise that the big dramatic promises for the future, are just that, ‘promises’ they are never going to come true. They are simply words. After a while you get tired of the drama, and just want a peaceful life.

What is worse is that the sociopath brings drama into your life DELIBERATELY. You soon find that the exciting relationship that you were in, becomes draining and can ultimately make you ill. Stress is not good for your health.


How stress can affect your mental health!

This is the Holmes and Rahe Stress Scale  http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Holmes_and_Rahe_stress_scale

This scale was developed in 1967 by two psychiatrists Thomas Holmes and Richard Rahe. Each stress factor has a point attached to it. If you add the stresses together, and you get a score of over 300, it is likely that you are going to be made ill. I counted personally what I had been through in the last three years of my life. My score was 680!!!

Sociopaths can make you ill. If you stay in the relationship with the sociopath, over a period of time, the constant dramas, threats against you, losses that you experience, will wear you down, and ultimately make you ill. What is worse is that the sociopath does this deliberately!

You might hope for a more peaceful life, that you can grow together and do nice things, but there will be constant changes, let downs, dramas. Nothing said ever comes to pass.

Have a look at the list for stress – and see what score did you get during the relationship?

To measure stress according to the Holmes and Rahe Stress Scale, the number of “Life Change Units” that apply to events in the past year of an individual’s life are added and the final score will give a rough estimate of how stress affects health.

Life event Life change units
Death of a spouse 100
Divorce 73
Marital separation 65
Imprisonment 63
Death of a close family member 63
Personal injury or illness 53
Marriage 50
Dismissal from work 47
Marital reconciliation 45
Retirement 45
Change in health of family member 44
Pregnancy 40
Sexual difficulties 39
Gain a new family member 39
Business readjustment 39
Change in financial state 38
Death of a close friend 37
Change to different line of work 36
Change in frequency of arguments 35
Major mortgage 32
Foreclosure of mortgage or loan 30
Change in responsibilities at work 29
Child leaving home 29
Trouble with in-laws 29
Outstanding personal achievement 28
Spouse starts or stops work 26
Begin or end school 26
Change in living conditions 25
Revision of personal habits 24
Trouble with boss 23
Change in working hours or conditions 20
Change in residence 20
Change in schools 20
Change in recreation 19
Change in church activities 19
Change in social activities 18
Minor mortgage or loan 17
Change in sleeping habits 16
Change in number of family reunions 15
Change in eating habits 15
Vacation 13
Christmas 12
Minor violation of law 11

Score of 300+: At risk of illness.

Score of 150-299: Risk of illness is moderate (reduced by 30% from the above risk).

Score <150: Only have a slight risk of illness.

How did you score?