A sociopath will identify his target, and if given the opportunity, if the assessment of the target shows that there can be potentially good yield. The sociopath will move in swiftly.
The sociopath is like an eagle who see’s his prey from the sky, and with beady eyes swoops in for the kill.
Photo – Rob Palmer
Other people, to the sociopath, are merely prey, targets, victims to be used. They move in close to their prey, watching and observing, they move in close, before going in for the kill.
The spectacular thing about this, is that you do not see an eagle, with sharp talons hunting its prey heading towards you. Instead, you see a dove of peace, there is something about this dove, which is different, you can’t quite put your finger on it. But, it looks like a dove, so you allow it close to you. What is different? If you look closely, you see that the dove has the piercing eyes of an eagle.
The sociopath circles, and moves into close proximity, fast! He constantly asks you how you feel about him? ‘Do you love me?’ he asks. You are made to feel guilty. The sociopath makes you feel sorry for him, you feel that you don’t want to reject him. You are circled and lured in fast. Speed is important, it doesn’t give you time to think and can confuse you.
You reason that this is a nice guy, and perhaps you should give him a chance? You feel guilty, and dismiss those initial gut reactions.
What you see, is not exactly what you will get with the socioopath. Whilst you are being shown, the white dove of love…
This is just an illusion. For the sociopath, is not a bird of peace. The sociopath is the cameleon, the magician, the master of disguise. Whilst he don’s the image of peace. He really only brings LOVE as a tool, to manipulate you.
In your own mind, it can be difficult when the relationship ends, to let go of this image, of the perfect love, that the sociopath works so hard to create. You will experience warning signs, a gut feeling in your stomach, warning you. Something about him, feels just ‘off key’ and ‘not right’. You cannot put your finger on what it is, and if you try to question it, the sociopath will play victim, and display ‘hurt feelings’ and so you dismiss these feelings, and feel guilty for doubting him.
I described it, as like watching someone singing a song on tv, but that the music was just slightly out of synch. That was the feeling that I had. Something was just, not quite right.
The sociopath has good eyesight, and has powers of observation that most people would miss. He watches, and observes, waiting for the perfect time to catch his prey. He learns about you, asking you questions, finding out as much information about you as he can. Later all of this information will be used against you. Watch the sociopath out of the corner of your eye, and you will see him observing you.
At first, you might mistake this for interest. It is interest, but not in the way that you think. He is assessing you, and mirroring back to you what you want, for a reason. That reason, is to use you up for his next source of supply.
Just like the eagle needs to hunt for prey, the sociopath does the same. Sometimes he knows exactly what it is that he is looking for. At other times, the perfect prey comes his way who is seeking something missing in their life.
Aside from being the hunter, the sociopath is also the chameleon. He can blend effortlessly into his new surroundings. This gives you the illusion, that this is ‘meant to be’ it just feels so very right. It wouldn’t occur to you, that there are people out there who will feign anything, to be exactly what you want and need, to lure you in. To capture you. To corner you.
The sociopath knows, that by simply doing the following, he would have caught his next victim. The sociopath is the master, and is practised at deception. Each time he follows the same pattern:
- Observe and analyse
- Overconfidence, charismatic and charming, great company
- Intense eye contact
- Moves physically in close, creating a sense of intimacy
- Lies and deception, to morph into the person that you need, creating a web of lies about his past, and his intentions for the future
- Provides false credentials
- Shows intense interest in whatever you are interested in
- Asks constant questions
- Is more interested in your life, than his own
- Comes across as someone who is hard done by
- Tells you that you are the love of his life, the person that he has waited all his life for
- Tells outrageous lies (which you will not be aware of until much later)
- Wants to take up all of your time, not even giving you room to breath or to see people, or do things that are important to you
- Is overly helpful, and romantic
By doing all of these things, he creates a false sense of intimacy, very quickly. Did you notice how quickly –
- He invaded your personal space
- He violated your privacy
- He isolated you
- You stopped having your own life, independence, and following your own dreams
- How quickly YOU became US
- How you were made to feel guilty if you thought of YOU and not US
You probably didn’t. The sociopath is the typical iron hand in the velvet glove, he is smooth, and as he has no conscience, and does not feel guilt, remorse or shame, he can lie without thinking, saying whatever he needs to say, to lure you in, manipulate and deceive you.
Being victim to this predator, is in no way a reflection on you. There is nothing that you did wrong, and there was also nothing that you could have done to change the outcome. It is the way that the sociopath is, the way that the sociopath operates. It is highly likely that the sociopath has done this time and time again in the past, and will repeat the same behaviour again in the future.
The sociopath is an opportunist. A chancer. A gamer. A predator. If it hadn’t been you, it would have been someone else. For always, the sociopath needs a victim in his life. He lives and thrives off of the life force of others. Constantly conning, and always follows the patterns of:
If only you knew this at the beginning? ….. but it was very hard to know that you were experiencing the ultimate act of betrayal and that it was indeed a predatory eagle, that was masquerading as the dove of peace and love.
Copyright datingasociopath.com 2013
Photo copyright Rob Palmer