I make no apologies for writing in male format. This is because it is easier to write than trying to write a post that is gender neutral. The words in this post, could equally apply to a female sociopath!
A question that is often asked that comes up on my stats, is
Is there hope for the sociopath?
What you are asking, is will that person, ‘get better’ will they ‘recover’?
By hope, what are you asking? Are you asking if there is hope for you, for them or for your own sanity?
Believe me a sociopath will rob you of any sanity you have left.
If you are asking, is there hope that they will suddenly be normal? – Which means that they WONT
- What to control you
- Dominate you
- Own you
- Mould and shape you
- Isolate you
- Cheat on you
- Lie to you
- Manipulate, and play mind games with you
- Drain you
- Gaslight you
No they won’t suddenly ‘recover’ have some personality transplant and turn into Mr or Mrs Right. They will always be someone elses ‘right now’ but not Mr or Mrs Right (if there is such a thing) –
The simple answer is because sociopaths DO NOT MOVE FORWARD. They do not progress. They simply move around and round in the same circle, and believe me, the same drama the same fights, the same old shit, gets pretty dull after a while. It gets old. Like watching paint dry.
The sociopath MIRRORS you and steals you from you
Reminds me a lot of this post it wasn’t a relationship, it was a , robbery
The sociopath is the mirror image of you. To get to know you, and to be in you life, they will be just like you. The longer that the sociopath is in your life, the more of your life you will see vanish. They will affect you, your ability to think. It’s a continual round of
- Brain washing
- Brain draining
Leaving you ultimately feeling
- Brain dead
They take over. There is no such thing as caring and sharing, it is always you providing. Sure the sociopath CAN provide!!… IF it is in their interests to do so. In fact they can do anything, if it is in their interests to do so.
Don’t expect normal – from abnormal
While they might appear like the nicest people in the world. Most of it is faked and feigned. Even when they are being nice almost always it is because it is in their interests to do so, to get what they want.
After everything that I knew, everything I had learned, I would still struggle with this. Sociopaths make good things bad. Always they will make good things bad. They play with your emotions, like they have the god given right to do so. Sociopaths always have a sense of entitlement, and they wouldn’t know the truth if it was staring them in the face. Indeed if they do know the truth, they do all that they can to either twist the truth, bend the truth, or completely fabricate another reality.
If you start off sane, it won’t last. Tired and drained from the constant drama, you become desperate to switch off.
The saddest thing of all…. is often, you still love them. You love them but you know that loving them will only bring destruction to you and your life.
You can continue, but you will only be their puppet, their possession, their toy that they are playing with. Yes this is what you are to them, their toy. I am sure at this allegation, the sociopaths who cant keep away from this site, will be up in arms…. ‘this isn’t true’ you will claim.
Actually it is true.
It is true, because you know what, at the end of a NORMAL relationship, no matter how bad things had been, usually there is care and compassion. With the sociopath, they might be telling you that they love you that morning, by evening, they are off, as if you meant nothing at all. Yes, they can do this, even if the relationship had lasted decades.
No normal person would be like this. For most normal people, loss is a sad thing. It isn’t something that you just ‘switch off’ ah ces la vie… move on. But it is the way that it is for a sociopath.
For the victim, you are left, slain, trying to pick up the pieces of your life, whatever is left of your life (if anything at all) with battered, and shattered self esteem, doubting your own ability, while they go riding off into the sunset on a white horse, and if they were really crafty – with a sackful of your possessions, money, friends, life – anything that they stole from you with them.
Don’t apply NORMAL rules to ABNORMAL people
Sociopaths don’t think like you. They don’t hurt like you. And those tears and wailing and drama that comes with them, yes this was fake. If you left the room, they would be looking at something else, and having a chuckle to themselves.
You cannot apply normal rules to abnormal people. I hate the wording abnormal. I hate the judgement, and I hate labelling people. I guess this is what I am doing right now, labelling. I am doing this, because it is important, for you as the victim/survivor to know, that when the truth comes out, and the actions are shocking, and you see that person has no guilt, no remorse and no shame, and you are left devastated…… just know…. that there is one place that they are normal – they are normal for a sociopath.
In this sense, they will never change. They won’t change because they are being their own special brand of ‘sociopath normal’. Its all about them… no change there, it always was.
Copyright datingasociopath.com 2015